Have a Happy Harem Christmas
by Lashana Inferno
Summary: Yes folks, it's finally here. The COMPLETE Harem 2003 Christmas special. Christmas Eve in the Harem will never be the same ever again. Especially since Lashana and Telca are in the thick of the festivities.
1. It's 'OhmyGodNo' In The Morning

Lashana and Telca own only themselves, Tvashtar, Kadrith, Rryslan, Kalamadea, Akhor and Korin. Tempest owns himself, Rebecca and Eve. Everyone else belongs to someone who isn't us. ^_^

Eee! Lookit! I actually finished the Christmas ficcie! Aren't you proud of me!? -- Lashana

Ah, Christmas! It's quite literally, the most wonderful time of the year. Well... except for Halloween. Cuz that's when you get lots of chocolate and it's okay for you to scare the living daylights out of people.....

Anyway, it's Christmas Eve in the Harem! Plans have been made, presents bought, people invited.... but it's not even six am yet, so no one actually cares about all that yet. Especially a certain Bonded pair, even if they _had_ planned to get up early to get the Palace ready for guests....

BBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

WHAM! WHAM! WHAM!!!

Yawning, Lashana let the hardcover book fall to the floor with a loud 'thud' before snickering and rolling over, returning to the warm, comfortable haven of Blackwargreymon's arms, fully intending to go back to sleep. Just because it was the Christmas season didn't mean that she had to be sleep-deprived. Or so she thought.

"Deck the hall with boughs of holly! Fa la la lala, lala la la. Tis the season to be jolly! Fa lala lala la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!"

How wrong she was. As Duncan's loud off-key singing continued to drift up from the kitchen, she groaned and yanked a pillow out from under her Bonded's head, pulling it over her face in a bid for either sleep or suffocation. Which ever happened first.

His consciousness dragged into coherency by the horrid singing, Blackwargreymon blearily rose his head from the place where his pillow should have been and blinked in disorientation. "Wha? L's'ana? Wha's time's it?"

Sighing at the nearly incoherent mumble, she peeked out from under the pillow and looked up into Blackie's drowsy golden gaze. "It's just after five thirty."

"Nuuugh...." Moving slowly, he pulled her closer and yanked the blankets over them, trying to drown out the sound of Duncan's voice and growling in annoyance when all he managed to do was pull the blankets completely askew, letting the cooler air of the room wash over their legs. "I'm gonna kill Duncan."

"You can't," Lashana moaned as she kicked the blankets back into place and curled up against him, trying to keep warm as she burrowed into his arms, promptly ignoring the trio of telepathic grumbles from the three dragons that were sleeping in a nest of pillows on the floor near her nightstand. "He's cooking the turkey."

"Damn."

"Fa lala la laaaa! Lala la laaaaaa!!"

"SHUT UP!! FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS! JUST _SHUT UP!!_"

"FA LALA LA LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

Blackwargreymon grunted and nuzzled his face into his Elf's hair as loud wails drowned out Duncan's singing, some hitting a pitch that made the windows of their balcony doors shake. "Telca's awake."

"Do tell," she chuckled wryly, smiling when he echoed her chuckle and playfully nipped at the point of her left ear, his breath warm against her neck as he purred and pulled her closer. "What are the chances that we don't have to get up until noon?"

There was another shriek from down the hallway, and Blackie sighed at the sound. "Very slim."

"Crap." As Telca's voice rose in another life-threatening tirade, the elf slowly sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed, stretching her arms high above her head with a yawn before she stood up and rose a hand to work out most of the tangles in her hair. Yawning again, she staggered into the bathroom and flicked on the light, peering at her reflection in mild annoyance as she grabbed the hair brush and yanked it through her white locks, muttering as she did so. "I look like an eyesore from the Liberance house of crap."

"What was that?"

She rolled her eyes at her Bonded's curious call. "Nothin'," she replied, raking the brush through her hair a final time before setting it down and glaring at her reflection. "Hair of death strikes again." Shaking her head in defeat, she snatched her black housecoat off a hook mounted on the back of the door then padded out of the bathroom, sighing when she saw that Blackwargreymon was still in bed and had actually curled all the blankets around himself. "Lazy bastard."

"I am _not_ lazy," he protested, his voice muffled by the blankets. "I'm just not stupid enough to get up at five-thirty in the morning!"

She glared at him, seeing him shift uncomfortably when he sensed her annoyance through the mind-link they shared. "I'll get you for that later," she promised him as she glanced down at her three dragons that were still tangled up with each other and sleeping peacefully. Granted that probably wasn't going to last long, not with Duncan's singing and Telca's threats echoing through the Palace. _I should get paid for this,_ she thought to herself as she slipped out of the room and portaled herself downstairs, fairly kicking the kitchen door open as she stomped into the room. "_Duncan!_ Shut! Up!"

The Immortal immediately paled and rose a wooden spoon as if to defend himself, taking a step back when he saw the expression on her face. "W-what?"

"It's _five-thirty_ in the morning! _Why_ are you doing this _now?!_"

"It's Christmas Eve! I have to get an early start if you expect me to feed everyone that's coming!"

Her right eye twitched. "They won't be here for another _twelve hours!_"

Remy groaned tiredly as he joined them, his hair mussed and tousled as he rubbed at his eyes with one hand and tugged his jogging pants into place with the other. "Mon ami, Duncan. I t'ink that if you don't stop de singin' dat I be forced t' kill you." He opened his eyes fully and blinked down at Lashana. "Oh. H'llo, petite. Dis idiot wake you too?"

"Actually Telca's screaming did," she smirked, jerking a thumb at Duncan as she continued. "This baka just finalized the fact that I had to get up at five-thirty in the bloody morning."

"Ah. Well, I just here to keep de Immortal alive 'till ma chere gets up. Telca wanted t' behead 'im herself." Curious as to what Duncan was cooking, he stepped past her and walked over to the turkey that was sitting in a pan on the island counter, his eyes widening in horror when he saw the strips of bacon lining the birds back. "Mon Dieu! What de 'ell are you doin' to de turkey?!"

Insulted by the horror in the Cajun's voice, the Immortal folded his arms across his chest and sniffed. "It's an old recipe. This way you don't have to baste it."

"But dat's what give it flavour!"

"That's what the bacon's for!"

Fighting the urge to gag, Remy grabbed a fork and distastefully lifted a strip of bacon from the poor turkey. "You don't put bacon on de turkey! It be _wrong!_"

Sighing, Lashana rose a hand to her forehead in an exasperated smack as her presence was completely ignored by the now bickering pair. "Goddess give me strength...."

"She's busy." Tugging at her long braid, Telca walked out of a portal and came to a stop next to her best-friend, joining her in looking at the two males. Her gaze was particularly drawn to a nummy-looking Remy, the sight making a slow smile spread over her lips before a slight nudge from Lashana jerked her attention back to the present. "So, um, what's going on?"

"They're fighting over how to cook a turkey," the elf sighed tiredly, her shoulders slumping. 

"Oh." Her part in the fight would have stayed at that had Duncan not whacked Remy's knuckles with the wooden spoon, making her barge deeper into the kitchen to snatch the weapon from him and smack him over the head with it. "No hitting of, Remy! If you want to fight over a stupid bird then, fine! Remy can take this turkey and you can cook another one!"

Duncan dodged another whack. "But we don't have another turkey!"

"We live next to a huge forest!" Lashana pointed out, a rather evil grin spreading over her lips. "You own a sword, go out and get yourself a bird."

"What?! No!"

"Then stop complaining," Telca said simply, folding her arms over her chest as she arched an eyebrow at Duncan pointedly. "Because you're not gonna win against my Remy."

Duncan sighed and sent a sideways look out the patio door. "I'll go get my coat."

"Well, that's one less thing to deal with," Lashana smiled as she walked over to the coffee machine and thumbed it on, glad that she had taken up the tradition of readying it the night before so that she didn't have to measure out the water and coffee grounds first thing in the morning. "Unfortunately I think I'm up for good."

Telca mumbled something under her breath and went to sit at the small table near the patio doors. "I think I am too. Well, I suppose it's for the best. We've got a lot to do in order to get ready for tonight."

"De guests, chere?" When she nodded, Remy turned his attention back to the turkey and continued to distastefully remove the strips of bacon from it. "How many be comin'?"

"Um, Lashana's folks, Tasuki, Rryslan, David, Tempest and his lot, and of course they're'll be all of us...."

"Dear Gods, it's not a Christmas get together, it's a fricken' _army_," Lashana mused with an amused smirk. "It'll be for the better if we have multiple turkeys though."

"Point."

"Good." Stretching, the Elf turned and headed back to the stairs. "Then I'm going back to bed."

"You can't!" Telca cried, grabbing Lashana's arm to stop her. "We have to decorate, put up lights, get a tree....."

"But it's five-thirty in the morning!"

"Actually, petite, it's more like six...." Remy trailed off at the look the elf gave him and turned his attention to the turkey as he started mixing the spices to add to it.

Sighing in defeat, Lashana yanked her arm free and grumbled. "Alright. Alright. I'll go get changed then start rounding up the guys to decorate. Okay?"

"Yup," Telca smiled, stopping Remy when he moved to follow the elf's example. "No, no. You're good like that."

Rolling her eyes, Lashana turned and headed back upstairs, hoping that the term 'naked chef' was not going to turn literal this Christmas. Though if Telca was in charge and Remy was cooking, it might just become reality. If so, she was ordering pizza.

She was back in the bedroom minutes later, and she paused at the closet for a moment, looking at a sleeping Blackie. Throwing maturity to the four winds, she tossed her housecoat into a corner on the floor and crawled back into bed, burrowing into her Bonded's arms as he sleepily rolled towards her and reached for her, a low purr leaving him as he buried his face into her hair.

"Mmn, what happ'n'ed?" he mumbled curiously, glad that she had rejoined him. She needed to sleep more, at least he thought so.

"S'nothin'," she told him, resting her cheek on his chest and listening to his heartbeat. "Telca's gonna be after me to get up again soon."

He growled protectively and pulled her closer, tucking his chin over her right shoulder. "M'not gettin' up. Neither 're you."

She chuckled softly and ducked her head to place a kiss on his throat, eliciting another purr as she snuggled close and let herself start to fall asleep again. Of course, that didn't last long, not with Telca up and coherent. Hence the fact that the portal that had just opened above them happened to contain a good amount of snow. Enough snow, in fact, to bury the bed, them, and half the room.

Now very awake and cursing, Blackwargreymon tucked the blanket more firmly around them and grumbled into Lashana's hair. "I am going to _kill_ Telca."

Sighing in mild disgust, the elf kicked the blanket off of herself and melted the snow with a well aimed volley of fire arrows, rolling her eyes at the three forms that had attached themselves to the ceiling from the shock of the cold snow. "C'mon. We'd better get down there before Telca comes up here to get us herself."

"Gods forbid," he muttered sourly as he swung his legs over the side of the bed and rose a hand to massage the back of his neck, his other hand scratching a spot on his chest as he yawned. A snap of fingers made him glance over at her to discover that she had used a spell to change her pyjamas into a pair of black boots, blue jeans and a tee shirt that read 'Happy fuckin' everything! Now leave me alone until next year!'. "Fitting shirt."

"I know," she grinned, hopping to her feet and holding out her arms to the three dragons that dive-bombed her.

::Tell me again why we're up this early?:: Korin grumbled into her thoughts, his ruby eyes half-lidded with sleep.

"Because it's Christmas," the elf replied, giving each of her dragons a kiss on the top of their heads. "Trust me, it'll all be worth it in the long run."

Black snorted as he pulled on a pair of jeans and a grey tee shirt. "And how long is this run gonna be?"

"Don't be snippy," she retorted lightly, smiling over at him. "It's _Christmas_, hun."

He smiled and walked over to her, purring as he kissed her cheek. "I know, love. And I know how important it is to you." He paused and smirked. "Otherwise I'd still be in bed."

She laughed and smacked him on the shoulder. "Is that the best you could do?"

"It's early," he protested with a chuckle, ducking another playful hit as he ushered her out the door, letting Korin land on his shoulder when the little dragon lost the chance on being able to perch on Lashana's shoulders, his brothers having beaten him to it. Stifling a yawn, he followed the elf downstairs, his hand lightly resting on the railing on the way down, more to remind himself to stay upright than to support himself.

The kitchen, when they finally reached it, was already semi-chaotic, and he winced at a present Kang's angry yelling, wishing that the draconian hadn't been the commander of a huge army and thus able to raise his voice to such a loud level. He also wished that the draco didn't have the bad habit of walking around in his pair of black boxers early in the morning. But, as usual, Lashana immediately rushed to the angry draco's side, grabbing his arm when it seemed like he was about to strike a glaring Telca.

"It's six in the bloody morning and you expect Duncan and I to go gallivanting around the forest looking for a freakin' _turkey?! Have you lost your mind?!?!_" His final roar drew groans and curses from the still sleeping bunch upstairs, and he sent a savage snarl in their direction before turning to glare at Telca again. 

Seeing Telca's eyes flash from amber to silver, Lashana dug her heels in and hauled on Kang's arm, dimly aware that Akhor and Kalamadea had taken to the air and were pulling on the draconians wings as she bodily _dragged_ him out of the kitchen and into the Main Hall. "Kang! _Kang!_" When he didn't look at her, she reached up, placed her hands on either side of his face and forced him to turn his head. "Kang. Calm. Down. Look, I know it's early, I've been up since five-thirty. _Believe _me, I _know_ how early it is."

He growled and reached up to remove her hands from his face, tail lashing as he glared back at the kitchen, fangs bared. "She has no right to--"

"Kang...."

Sighing at the pleading tone of her voice, he sucked in a breath and held it for a long moment, forcing himself to calm down before turning his gaze to her, giving her hands a gentle squeeze when he realised he was still holding them. "Sorry."

"It's alright. I can understand. It's just, this is going to be a very busy day. We're all going to be put to work doing jobs that we don't want to do." When he sighed miserably and nodded, she smiled and gave him a hug. "Look, I'll make you a deal. You help out today, and tomorrow I'll portal you back to Krynn for a few days. You can visit with Slith and the guys. How's that sound?"

His foul mood retreating, he returned the embrace and wrapped her up in his wings as well, keeping the hug brief since Blackwargreymon was in the other room. "It sounds like we have a deal."

"Good. Now go get changed," she said with a chuckle as she pulled away while playfully poking him in the stomach, sending a silent thought to Kalamadea and Akhor to go with the draconian to help him. "Unless you plan on trying to serenade a turkey to it's death."

"Ha ha," he rumbled, chucking her under her chin. "Very funny. Go have your coffee, I'll go find Duncan."

"Thanks!" Glad that one hurdle had been dealt with, she turned and went back into the kitchen, rolling her eyes at Black's questioning look as she headed for the coffee machine. Unfortunately for her, a blue blur of motion beat her to it, shoving her backwards as Zelgadis skidded to a stop from using his demon speed and grabbed the mug she had been reaching for, smiling at her as he took the first sip.

Smiling in the most restrained way possible, she turned to Remy and picked up a fork. "Can I borrow this? Thanks." With one fluid movement, she spun and tackled Zel, the two of them vanishing into a dust cloud where only glimpses of a fork, a two-by-four and a potato peeler could be seen.

A bleary eyed Nightcrawler walked into the kitchen then, yelping as he tripped over the dust fight and crashed to the floor.

Using that distraction to her advantage, Lashana drove the fork through the crotch of Zelgadis' pants, grinning ferally at his shriek as the metal barely missed certain important male qualities. Happy that she had gotten her revenge, she stood and calmly picked up the mug of coffee, sipping from it as she reached down and pulled Nightcrawler to his feet. "Hi Fuzzy."

"Uh... hi?"

"_Anyway_, here's a list of what we have to today," Telca announced as she thrust a sheet of paper to Blackwargreymon, who took it hesitantly, his eyes widening as he read over it.

"Shovel the entrance, find a tree, decorate the outside grounds of the Palace, clean the Palace, cut firewood...." he paused as he looked over the two dozen or so other tasks, then rose his gaze to Telca, completely ignoring Zelgadis as the chimera crawled out of the kitchen. "Are you insane?"

"Only enough to be interesting," she smiled.

"There is no way we can do all this by tonight! It's impossible!"

Rubbing sleep out of his eyes, Nightcrawler grabbed the sheet and read over it, blinking curiously. "There are a lot, but they're not major. I could hang the lights on the Palace and bushes outside. Beast could help me."

"Okay," Lashana nodded, catching onto his plan. "Then we can get Malcho and Kenshin to decorate inside the Palace."

"Why those two?" Telca asked curiously.

"Kenshin's got a good eye and Malcho can reach the ceiling."

"Ah. Point."

The elf smiled and turned back to the list. "Wolverine can get the tree no problem, and the firewood."

Suddenly remembering something, Telca reached out and tapped the elf on her shoulder. "We have to go to Walmart. We need new lights for the tree. I checked on the old ones we have in the attic and they're tangled together something fierce. It'll be easier if we just buy new ones."

"Fine with me," the other sorceress agreed. "I need to pick up more wrapping paper. And I think Tvashtar needed to do some last minute shopping too."

"Ja. So do I," Nightcrawler added, sending a winning smile at Telca. "So don't leave without the fuzzy-dude."

Laughing, she reached over and ruffled his tousled blue hair. "Wouldn't dream of it."

"Kewl. I'll go tackle the driveway," Lashana grinned, handing the list back to Blackwargreymon before she headed out into the Main Hall, pausing to grab a knee-length duster out of the closet before heading out onto the front steps, looking out at the white expanse that lay before her. Two feet of snow covered everything in sight, the bright sunlight making it almost impossible to look at the whiteness without being partially blinded.

Rubbing her eyes to clear them of spots, she gathered her magicks to herself and rose her hands, a red aura beginning to swirl around her. "_Source of all power. Crimson fire burning bright! Gather to my hand and become my power!_" Closing her eyes as magick flooded into her, an almost drugging experience, she used her will to form the magick into what she wanted, only opening her eyes when she was ready to release the spell. "_Fireball!_" 

Like a perfectly aimed arch of power, the flames spread to the width of the driveway and surged forward, evaporating all the snow that covered the road leading from the Gates to the front steps, leaving perfect, iceless concrete behind.

"Ain't that cheatin'?" Wolverine asked from behind her, smiling at her reassuringly when he saw her jump slightly. "Didn't mean ta scare ya, darlin'."

"It's okay. And no, that isn't cheating. Not when you live with sorceresses," she added with a wink, grinning at the chuckle that elicited. She was pleased to see that he was already warmly dressed in his boots, jeans and red flannel shirt over a white tee shirt. "How long have you been up? Have you seen the list yet?"

"Kurt jus' got me up," he muttered, reaching up to run his hand through his usually messy hair, feeling the ends of them curve upwards. "And yeah, I've heard o' the list. Somethin' about me gettin' a tree and firewood?"

"Do you mind? We're really trying to get everything done before people start showing up."

He looked from her pleading gaze out to the snow, then shrugged. "Yeah, sure. But I'm gonna need someone else ta come wit' me. I ain't draggin' a tree back on my own."

"Okay. Um...." She peeked inside the Palace and spotted Zelgadis walking down the stairs, this time dressed in his usual sorcerer's outfit. "Zel will go with you!"

"Huh?" Wary, the chimera looked from the elf to the feral with a certain amount of fear. "What?"

"Were gonna go get a tree," Wolverine told him as he pulled his leather jacket out of the closet and pulled it on. "C'mon. I know where ta look."

He paused, then folded his arms over his chest and looked at Lashana. "What if I don't want to go?"

His answer came in the form of the purple haired blur that shot passed him and tackled Lashana. "It's Christmas Eve!" Xellos cried happily. "Mistletoe and forced family get togethers and stress! Fun fun fun!"

"On second thought, I'll go with Wolverine," Zel said as he and Wolverine edged around the duo and headed for the forest that lay in the backyard, leaving Lashana to get rid of Xellos on her own.

Of course, for her, this was something that had been well rehearsed.

Propping a foot between them, she kicked him off of her and leapt to her feet, glaring at him where he lay sprawled on the front steps. "Don't do that! And you will not ruin Christmas! Is that clear?"

Amethyst eyes glittered in the sunlight as he looked at her. "I won't destroy the festivities, Lashana-chan! I promise!"

Feeling wary because that had been too easy but not really wanting to know more than she already did, she left the conversation at that and headed back inside, shucking out of her jacket as she headed upstairs, intent on waking the rest of the Harem. Deciding to wake Tvashtar before using the air horn she carried in a portal to wake the others, she paused by his door and knocked on it softly, then harder when he didn't answer. 

Still getting no response, she let herself in and rose a hand to smother a giggle when she saw him sprawled out across his bed, tangled up in the sheets while his head lay buried under a pillow. Letting an evil grin spread over her lips, she took a running start then tackled him, yelling out his name as she landed on him, her fingers digging into his sides as she tickled him.

That woke him up alright. With a yelp, he jerked out of her reach and toppled off the bed, landing in a heap next to the night table with a low groan. When he finally sorted himself out, he rolled over and looked up at his bed, smirking when he saw a grinning Lashana staring down at him. "I'll get you for that," he promised, eliciting a chuckle from her as she sat up on his bed and rested her elbows on her knees. Kicking the tangle of blankets from himself, he gingerly got to his feet then sat on the edge of his bed, still smiling at her in amusement. "Why are you so happy?"

"It's Christmas," she beamed. "My favourite holiday! Trust me, you'll love this. It's even better than Halloween!" She bounced off his bed and landed on her feet, turning to grin at him. "I just thought I'd wake you up nicely before I got out the air horn and started patrolling the hallways."

"Gee, I'm honoured," he said wryly, ducking the pillow she chucked at his head. "Need help getting the others up?"

A slow grin spread over her lips. "Hell, yeah."

TBC


	2. Waking the Harem and Lashana's Parents A...

_Lashana and Telca own only themselves, Tvashtar, Kadrith, Rryslan, Kalamadea, Akhor and Korin. Tempest owns himself, Rebecca and Eve. Everyone else belongs to someone who isn't us. ^_^_ "So where is this famed tree?" Zelgadis asked as he trudged after Wolverine, who was stomping through the deep snow purposefully. "We're a long way from the Palace." 

"I know where I'm goin'," the feral replied as he sped up, the snow not discouraging him in the least as he walked. The scent of the air around him calmed him greatly, a scent of pure clean air mixed with the vibrant scent of evergreen trees. His favourite pastime as of late had been to take long hikes through the forest, enjoying the crisp winter air and pristine snow. Already he had memorized numerous paths to his favourite lookouts; one near the lake, the other at the small waterfall, and another where he was heading now, at the entrance to a sort of natural tunnel created by dozens of huge, tall, evergreen trees. 

Zelgadis slipped behind him, but caught himself, and he was inwardly relieved that his part golem physiology kept him from feeling anything but the most extreme cold. He had pulled the lower half of his mask over his face as he walked, that added with his hood hiding everything but his eyes from view. The wind played with his cape, tugging on it as he walked, the wind making his eyes tear slightly. "You ready for this huge get together the girls are planning?" 

"Pretty much," Wolverine shrugged. "Ain't nothin' to it, really. You?" 

"I'm not sure. I never really know how to react when they plan these things. This 'Christmas' thing, it's still weird to me." 

"Nah. S'just like every other holiday. The darlin's just like this one more than the others." He shoved his way through a bush and side stepped around a birch tree before beholding what he had been looking for. A huge eight foot pine tree stood proudly before him, and a quick sniff of the air told him that it wasn't home to any birds. "Stand 'side. M'gonna take it down." A quick clench of his fists made his adamantium claws pop out with a whisper of metal on metal, and he grinned ferally as he stepped forward, ducking under the lower branches before pulling a fist back. 

With a loud yell of, "Timber!" and two savage slices to it's truck, the tree came crashing down. 

The only drawback was that it landed on Zelgadis, who screamed shrilly as said evergreen tree slammed him into the ground. 

Sighing in exasperation, Wolverine stalked over to the pair of legs that were sticking out from under the tree, grabbed the chimeras ankles, and hauled him free, arching an eyebrow curiously when Zelgadis yelped and started patting at his legs, doing a little dance as he suddenly shrieked and grabbed at his crotch. "What tha hell?" 

"The squirrels! The _squirrels!!_" Zel screamed, flailing one leg in an attempt to kick one of the vermins out of his pants. 

Rolling his eyes again, Wolverine popped his claws again and sliced off the bottom of Zel's pants, turning them into cut off shorts and freeing the two black squirrels that had been trapped in there. "You are truly pitiful," he muttered to the chimera before sheathing his claws and turning to the tree. "C'mon, let's get this thing home." 

Just getting his breath back from hyperventilating in horror, Zelgadis looked up from his ruined pants to Wolverine, then sighed heavily and went to help him haul the tree home, not looking forward to the hour's walk that lay ahead of them. 

~*~ 

The blare of noise that came forth from the air horn was loud enough that it made the walls of the fourth floor vibrate, and Tvashtar snickered from where he stood beside Lashana as numerous groans and cries of protest came forth from the various rooms around them. Chuckling rather evilly, he grabbed the air horn from her and blared out another loud belch of sound, this time ducking the various pieces of furniture that came his way. 

Grinning, Lashana started pacing up and down the hall, yelling as she did so. "It's Christmas and tonight's the big get together so y'all'd better get yer arses in gear now!" she cried, her voice wavering with mirth as she broke out into song. "Deck the hall with poison ivy, fa lala lala la la lala! Tis the season to be naughty, fa lala lala la la lala! Smash the windows, slash the tires, fa lala lalala la la la. Set the teachers hair on fire! Fa lala la la, lala la _laaaaa!_ All together now! Deck the halls with--" 

"Alright amiga!" Malcho yelled from within his room. "We're awake! We're awake!!" 

"Good! Now _GET UP!_" 

"That means you too, Kadrith!" Tvashtar added with a toothy grin, chuckling at the low grumble from the end of the hall. "Either get up or we'll get Xellos to come give you incentive!" 

The mass stampede of people shook the Palace down to it's foundation, and after the last Harem Member had pounded past her, Lashana slowly crept out from under the small table she had taken shelter under, seeing that Tvashtar had merely leapt up to cling to the ceiling with all four sets of talons. "Well," she said cheerfully. "That worked well." 

"Speak for yourself," he muttered as he dropped down to the floor, flexing his hands. "That just took a year off my life." 

She laughed and slapped his arm as she walked past him and headed for the stairs. "You're Immortal m'dear. I don't think it matters." 

"Sure it does!" he protested as he joined her, keeping pace with her as they descended the stairs. "Besides, I don't like the thought of living forever." 

She frowned curiously and glanced at him. "Why?" 

He turned golden eyes on her and reached out to trail the smooth curve of a talon across her left cheek. "I don't want to see you die, kelestra. You made me a part of your family, and now I can't even imagine living without you." 

Tears brimmed in her eyes as she reached over and hugged him tightly, smiling when he wrapped his arms around her to return the embrace. "I love you too, Tvashtar," she murmured as she got up on her tip toes to give him a kiss on the side of his snout. "And don't start worrying yet. I'm not planning on leaving this mortal coil for some time yet." 

"Good," he whispered into her hair, giving her a strong squeeze before gently releasing her. "Now, tell me more about this 'Christmas' thing. We're doing what to a tree?" 

She chuckled softly and wiped at her eyes. "Decorating it. You'll see. Actually I may need you to help me get the decorations out of the attic..." She trailed off at the sound of explosions from outside and exchanged worried glances with her brother before bolting down the last flight of stairs and making a beeline for the kitchen, where Telca's curses could be heard. 

Seeing that all the Harem had congregated there for breakfast, Lashana bit her lower lip and barely managed to weave her way through the chaos without slowing down or running anyone over, barely managing to skid to a stop before she slammed into Telca, who was standing out on the deck lobbing fireballs at the large turkey that Duncan and Kang were chasing around the backyard. 

"I hate birds!" Telca yelled to the duo. "If you bring that thing in here while it's alive I'll fireball the lot of you!" 

"Uhhh..." Not stupid enough to fight with Telca when she was like this, Lashana sent a frantic look to Remy, who nodded in understanding and immediately moved to distract Telca with a kiss while Lashana turned back to look at the two chasing the turkey just in time to see Duncan trip and crash to the snow, making Kang stumble over him and topple to the ground next to him. The turkey, not happy about being chased, turned and pecked Kang in the forehead before spinning around and bolting, the airborne Kalamadea and Akhor flying after it. 

"Ow! Stupid bird!" Axe raised high, Kang got to his feet again and gave chase. "_Get back here!_" 

"A mighty draconian Commander, and a four hundred year old Immortal, brought down by a turkey." Lashana sighed shook her head. "This is pitiful." 

"I t'ink dat maybe de duo be in trouble, petite," Remy said as he held Telca to himself, reassuring her just by touching her. 

"Yeah...." Frowning, she went into the kitchen to grab a steak knife, then walked back out onto the deck, very aware of everyone's gazes on her as she pulled Telca away from Remy and gave her the knife. "If you don't get that bird in one throw I'm buying a parrot." 

Telca's eyes widened. "Don't you fuckin' dare!!" she screamed, fear and disgust in her voice as she flung the knife, hearing Kang and Duncan's yelps of fear as the turkey went down. "Wow. I didn't know I could do that." 

Job done, Lashana turned and headed back inside, ignoring the numerous stares of shock from the Guys as she went to get herself another cup of coffee, sipping the warm liquid happily. "Okay," she smiled as she brandished the long list of chores for the day. "We've got a lot to do before people start showing up, so everyone pay attention. Malcho! You and Kenshin are decorating the inside of the Palace. Once Wolvie and Zel get back with the tree I'll need you to help them set it up Malcho. You too Blackie. Actually wait, Kenshin can cook, so nix the decorating. Ken-chan, you help out in the kitchen, bake something. Mewtwo, you're with Malcho. Beast, Nightcrawler already volunteered you to help him hang the lights outside, get Wolvie to help you once he gets back. As for the rest of you: _clean!_ This place has to be habitable by tonight! That means that the pizza boxes hidden in the game room get thrown out and that someone actually has to clean out the fridge! But, if anyone has to get last minute gifts, Telca and I are doing a run to Wal-Mart, so you can come then. Ken-chan, if you need ingredients, just give me a list, kay? Good, did everyone get that?" When no one answered, she sighed. "I'll take that as a 'yes'." 

Malcho took a shot at protesting. "But mi amiga! It's only seven in the morning!" 

Growling softly, Lashana grabbed a fistful of his hair and hissed. "If I have to be up and cheerful, then _you_ have to be up and cheerful. Comprende?" 

He nodded franticly. "Si!" 

"We might as well head out to Wal-Mart now," Telca said as she joined them with Remy at her heels. "Especially if we need decorations for the tree." She paused for a moment, then grinned. "And I know where to get the money for it to! Be right back!" 

"I hate it when she grins like that," Blackie muttered as he watched her leap into a portal, the glowing doorway snapping shut behind her. "Bad things always happen when she grins like that." 

"At least it's not gonna happen to us," Kadrith pointed out, receiving many murmurs of agreement from the group. 

~*~ 

Elsewhere, in the warm den of an expensive mansion, a certain bald telepath rose his gaze from the newspaper he had been reading, one eyebrow arching curiously as he beheld the burgundy haired woman before him. "Yes? May I help you?" 

"Naw," Telca grinned. "I can handle it m'self." Before he could react - for he had read her mind - she lunged at him and, quick as a flash, pick-pocketed his wallet, smiling as she plucked a certain Gold Card into her fingers. Sensing that he was trying to use his mind powers on her, she merely let her mind dip into the gutter and radiated those thoughts to him, a rather evil smirk spreading over her lips when he winced and clutched at his head. "Thanks for the card, Xavier. We'll put it to good use. Ta!" 

Cyclops burst into the room seconds after her portal had vanished, rushing over to his mentor with an air of concern, seeing the grimace upon the man's face. "Professor! Are you alright? Who was that?" 

"_That,_" the telepath muttered. "Was Gambit's girlfriend. And she stole my Gold Card." 

"Oh." Cyclops paused for a moment, then tried to cheer Xavier up. "At least she didn't get the MasterCard." 

There was a flash of silver light as a hand reached out and grabbed the card from the wallet that still lay on the floor. "Yoink!" 

Xavier sighed. 

~*~ 

"You _stole_ de Professor's credit cards?!" When Telca nodded gleefully and clutched the cards to her chest, Remy beamed and gathered her up in a hug. "My chere! She learns so quickly!" 

"That is hardly something to compliment her on," Beast muttered. 

"Oh, live a little," Lashana smirked, elbowing him lightly. "I'll buy you a box of Twinkies if you smile." 

"For that, my dear," he grinned as he bowed to her, his bright white teeth with fanged incisors a stark contrast to his dark blue fur. "I would smile until the world itself ended!" 

"I may hold you to that!" she replied, cocking her head curiously when she heard the front doorbell. "Dammit, someone get the door!" she called as she ran out of the kitchen, blood draining from her face when she saw Xellos answering the door. Gulping, she put on a extra burst of speed and shoulder-checked him into a wall, taking his place as the door swung open to reveal her parents. "Mom? Dad? Shit, you're early! I wasn't expecting you for hours! Uh... we're not even ready for anything...." 

Diane shrugged. "We were up early and got bored." 

"Early? It's seven in the morning! You were up earlier than this?" 

"Six in the bloody morning," Pete, her father, groaned. "You have coffee, right?" 

"Gods yes." 

"Good." 

"Right. Um.... Where's Logan?" Curious, Lashana peeked around her parents, then yelped when a hundred-thirty pound Alaskan Malamute landed on her chest, knocking her to the floor as the large gleeful dog slathered her face with doggie kisses. "Ugh! Logan, you're crushing my ribs...." Groaning, she shoved the dog off of her and wiped at her face with the back of her right hand, grimacing when the malamute wriggled under her left arm then rolled onto his back in a bid for her to scratch his white-furred belly. 

"So! How are things going around here?" Diane asked as she helped her daughter to her feet, then let herself into the Palace, pausing to hang up her coat and her husband's before turning to look at the white haired elf. 

"Things are.... slow. Most of the guys only got up half an hour ago, though Wolverine and Zelgadis are out getting the tree and Telca and I are just about to head out to the twenty-four hour Wal-Mart for decorations." 

Pete winced. "This isn't going to turn out like Easter did, is it?" 

She paused. "I really don't know yet." 

"Figures." 

"Hey, I resent that, Dad." 

"Eh! Kelestra! We're ready to go....ut...." Tvashtar froze in place when he saw the elf's parents standing in the Main Hall and took a step backwards in nervousness when they looked over at him. "Um...." 

Diane smiled at him warmly. "Hello. You're new, aren't you?" 

Taking the initiative, Lashana hurried over to Tvashtar and grabbed his arm before he could bolt, pulling him forward as she walked back to her folks. "This is gonna come as a bit of a surprise, but I, uh..... well, I adopted a brother without telling you. Surprise! You have a son!" 

Pete blinked. "You....what?" 

She sighed. "It's a long story. Suffice it to say that he was sent here to be my Guardian, since I'm the Chaos Knight and all. And the other Knights before me, well, they were complete wackjobs and tortured him and everything, so I swore to him that he would be safe here. Three months ago, I made a Blood Pact with him, so we're brother and sister now." The explanation was spotty at best, but the gist of it was there. 

Still shocked, Diane merely blinked at the six foot tall humanoid dragon for a moment longer, then adapted. "Tvashtar, was it?" When he nodded, she moved forward and gave him a hug, feeling him jerk a little in surprise at the gesture. "Welcome to the family. You'd better tell us the whole story later, hmm? Lashana tends to only give us the gist of things, as if we can't handle what goes on around here." 

"Um, alright," the draconid stammered, glancing from Lashana to Diane in shock that was slowly giving way to relief. "It's nice to meet you finally. Lashana's told me a lot about you." 

Recovered from his shock, Pete stepped forward and held out his hand, smiling when Tvashtar took it in a strong shake. "You'll definitely have to fill us in." 

"I will. But for now," the Guardian glanced down at the elf. "Telca wants to head out to Wal-Mart." 

"Right. Right. Mum, Dad, make yourselves at home. If you don't know where something is.... actually wait a second." _Akhor! Kalamadea! Can you come here? I need a favour!_ She waited patiently for a moment before smiling at the white and blue forms that flew over to her, making her rise her right arm for them to land on as she grinned at her folks. "You remember that egg the guys gave me? Well these two, and one other were the result. Mom, Dad, meet Kalamadea and Akhor. They'll be your guides and protectors while I'm gone." 

"Protectors?" her father echoed. 

"Xellos is feisty today," she said by way of explanation before turning her attention to the two dragons perched on her arm. "You two mind keeping on eye on them for a bit?" 

::No,:: Kalamadea telepathed, using his 'wideband' frequency to include Pete and Diane into the conversation. ::We don't mind at all. Though you might want to yell at Korin, he's pigging out on those chocolates you bought for Telca.:: 

"He's _what?!_ Dammit. I'll just buy another box. Anyway, Kalama, stick with Mom, Akhor, stay with my Dad, kay?" 

::Sure.:: 

"Okay, Mom, Dad, they usually perch on my shoulder like this," she waited until Kalamadea had climbed up her arm to perch on her shoulder, then smiled as he lay down and curled himself around the back of her neck, his tail wrapping around her throat. "Or they stay like this. It doesn't hurt, and they're light enough that they won't bother you. Though if it does, they can just perch somewhere else in whatever room you're in. Okay?" 

When they nodded, she sent a silent message to the duo, watching as they vaulted over to her parents. Akhor, sensing Pete's unease, chose to merely perch on his shoulder, while Kalamadea, curled around Diane's shoulders, purring when she scratched under his chin. 

"Hey! You're early!" Grinning, Telca joined them with Nightcrawler and Kadrith by her sides, going to give Diane and Pete welcoming hugs. "Welcome to the chaos! Everyone's gonna be running around like mad, but don't let that stop you from having a good time! Anyway, Elfy, we gotta go. Kadrith's coming with, so we've got a full car. Let's motor!" 

"Um, Telca?" Meeting up with her at the closet while Tvashtar introduced Kadrith to her parents, Lashana pitched her voice low so only her friend could hear. "There's not enough seat space for the two Guardians, us and Kurt. We don't have a big enough car." 

Purple eyes widened at the realisation. "Shit. I didn't think of that. Well, who can we 'borrow' a car from?" 

Lashana glanced at her father and gave him the puppy-dog eyes. "Daddy....?" 

"No." 

"Damn." Frowning she tapped a finger against her chin for a moment before a slow smile spread over her lips. "I know the perfect car. C'mon." Without waiting for an answer, she opened a portal and pulled her friend through it, grinning when they emerged out onto a sidewalk in the middle of Los Angeles, where the darkness of night was kept at bay by numerous streetlights. "Keep watch." 

Telca opened her mouth to protest, then closed it again when she recognised the black oldstyle convertible that Lashana was moving to hotwire, her grin mirroring the elf's. "This is a great idea." 

"Isn't it though?" Ripping wires free, the elf studied the for a moment before choosing two opposing colours and twining the copper wires together, grinning when the engine roared to life. "C'mon! Quick!" 

Having heard the engine of his car come to life, Angel of Angel Investigations dashed out of his hotel in time to see two women drive his car into a portal, the golden doorway snapping shut behind them, leaving only their cry of 'yoinks and away!' floating on the winds. "My _car!!_ Dammit.... _Wesley!_ I need a portal spell! Fast!" 

Meanwhile, dimensions away, Lashana brought the car to a sharp stop and yelped when it slid an extra five meters before it finally came to a standstill. "No snow tires. Oh, well." 

Pete and Diane watched from the open doors as the car skidded to a stop, mere inches from the rear bumper of his own Silver Intrepid. "If they hit my car...." 

"We won't!" Lashana called. "C'mon guys, pile in!" 

"I hope we survive this," Kadrith muttered as he followed Nightcrawler and his brother out to the car, waiting until the motorized top for the car had finished rising before opening the door and crawling into the backseat, relieved to discover that there was plenty of room. 

"We'll be back soon!" Telca waved to Lashana's parents as the elf threw the car into reverse and slammed her foot on the gas, sending the car screeching backwards. 

Panicking, Kadrith dug his talons into the seat in front of him. "Can't you drive facing forward?!" 

Lashana snorted. "Baby," she muttered as she slammed on the brakes, cranked the emergency brake and spun the wheel, sending the car into a wicked one-hundred eighty degree spin so that it was facing forward. "Happy now?" 

Nightcrawler grinned, ignoring the hyperventilating Kadrith. "That was so cool!" 

Sighing, Diane watched as the black convertible rose onto it's two right tires as it raced around the corner, it's tires skidding on the icy road. She arched an eyebrow and turned to her husband. "I don't care what you say," she muttered. "She gets that from your side of the family."   
  


TBC   
  
  



	3. To WalMart! Yoinks and Away!

_Lashana and Telca own only themselves, Tvashtar, Kadrith, Rryslan, Kalamadea, Akhor and Korin. Tempest owns himself, Rebecca and Eve. Everyone else belongs to someone who isn't us. ^_^_   
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Less than an hour later, the black convertible screeched into the Wal-Mart parking lot, jumped a curb and landed perfectly between the two yellow lines of a parking space. As Lashana went about uncurling the wires, Kadrith staggered out of the car and dropped to his knees, close to kissing the unmoving ground in relief. "Thank Gaia, I'm still alive." 

"Lovely," Telca snorted as she got out of the car. "My Guardian's a wuss." 

"I am not!" 

"Then get off the ground you git." 

While Tvashtar chuckled and got out using the opposite rear door, Nightcrawler merely bamfed his way out, reappearing next to Lashana in a cloud of brimstone and grinning at her sheepishly when she coughed. "Sorry." 

"S'okay," she muttered, closing the driver's door and turning to take a look at the store. "How's about we meet back at the car in an hour? Sound good?" 

"Ja! I'm gone!" And thus Nightcrawler was, in another burst of brimstone that made Lashana start coughing again. 

Chuckling, Tvashtar threw an arm around his kelestra's shoulders and led her towards the store, grinning over at Telca and Kadrith as they walked. "So, I'll take my brother shopping while you two ladies get the decorations. I don't think we'll need an hour, so we might end up finding you earlier." 

"That's fine with me," Lashana smiled, grinning when Telca grabbed a cart from were it had been abandoned in the parking lot and was now riding it across the lot. "I think this might just be interesting." 

Kadrith smirked as Telca let out a whoop of laughter and shook his head. "I always said that my Avatar was nuts." 

"And I've always told you, 'duh'," Tvashtar chuckled, ducking a playful smack from Lashana afterwards. "What? It's true!" 

"Well you don't have to spread it around!" she grinned, nudging him in his side with an elbow before running after Telca. "I'll catch you later! Telca! Wait for me!" The burgundy haired sorceress had already vanished into the store, and she cursed softly as she darted around a Klingon couple and dodged a smack from them, inwardly glad that they had been forced to leave their _bat'leth's_ at the door. 

Having caught a glimpse of Telca heading into the woman's clothing section, she immediately headed there, weaving through the racks of clothing until she stood in the middle of the section, looking around for her friend curiously. "Telca?" 

A giggle answered her, and she spun to look at her friend that had just exited the changing rooms, her eyes squinting in pain when the lights of the store reflected off all the sequined clothing Telca had put on. There were so many colours and bedazzled patterns that it actually hurt to look at her. "You wacko," she laughed. "What are you doing?" 

Grinning, Telca struck a dramatic pose, one arm pointing high in the air. "As God as my witness....as God as my witness they're not going to lick me! I'm going to live through this and when it's all over I'll never be unsequined again! No! Nor any of my folks. Even if I have to lie, steal, cheat, or kill. As God as my witness, I'll _never_ go unsequined _again!_" 

Clutching at her sides from laughing so hard, Lashana met her best-friend's dancing gaze and laughed. "You should see yourself!" she chuckled, grinning when Telca glanced down at herself and snickered. "You look positively blinding!" 

Telca swept and arm in front of herself and took a bow. "Thank you, dahling! Oop! Employee! Be right back!" Trying hard not to snicker, she ducked back into the changing room and put her other clothes back on, doing her best to keep a straight face as she walked out and bumped into the employee. "These outfits are positively, horrid! Not enough sequins at all! I thought this was a high-quality store! Hmpft!" Head held high in a snooty manner, she dumped the clothes into the employee's arms and stalked off, rejoining Lashana and sharing a chuckle with her before they headed for the Christmas decorations. 

They staggered into the correct isle minutes later, still snickering about her little impromptu performance, and she put a great amount of willpower into getting herself under control as she walked over to the decorations and eyed the choices critiquely. "Well, good thing they're stocked up. I'll get these, you get the lights." 

"Aye!" Leaving the cart with Telca, Lashana headed off to the indoor and outdoor lights, looking over the various brands for a split second before stealing a cart from someone and starting to fill it with both kinds of lights, planning for every kind of idea the Harem would have for decorating as she made her choices, only returning to Telca's side when her cart was full, a grin spreading over her lips when she saw that her friend had filled her cart to the brim with decorations. "I have a bit of room left over if you want to get another few boxes." 

"Good idea. What do you think? The red or the blue?" 

"Personally? Red. It's more festive. And I think that garland would look nice too." 

"Another good idea. You're certainly on a roll today," Telca teased as she set the box into the elf's cart then went to grab five lengths of the garland, dumping them onto her cart. "Okay, I think we're good to go. Anything else you think we'll need?" 

Lashana thought about that for a moment, then smirked. "Tylenol." 

"Right! To the pharmacy!" 

~*~ 

Back at the Palace, Kang was wondering how Duncan had managed to live this long. It was obvious that the Immortal's fighting skills were the only reason he had survived, for he didn't think that his culinary tastes would have lengthened his lifetime. They had just finished plucking the turkey, leaving the feathers in a garbage bag near the steps of the deck, and he was hoping that Lashana or Telca was going to give him another task to do in order to separate them. 

Sneezing for the fifth time in as many minutes, Duncan sniffled and rubbed at his watery eyes. "I tinb I neeb an andihidtamid." 

Kang blinked. "What the hell did you just say?" 

Sniffling again, Duncan gave it another shot. "I sab I tinb I meeb an andihistabmid!" 

"R_iiiii_ght." Shaking his head, he headed up the stairs and opened the patio doors, pausing for a moment when he saw a familiar person puttering around the kitchen. "Diane!" 

Smiling, the woman turned away from looking for the coffee sweetener and grinned at the draconian. "Kang. It's nice to see you again." She eyed the decapitated turkey he was holding in his left hand with an arched eyebrow and held back a smirk. "Turning native?" 

"Wha? Oh, this. No, no. This is Duncan's bird." When she gave him a questioning look, he walked over and dumped the bird onto an expanse of wax paper, explaining to her as he washed his hands. "See, Telca has Remy cooking one turkey, and she made us go, uh, fetch one for Duncan, because he wanted to cook one too. Actually maybe you can help me, he's babbling about something and I can't understand him." 

Insulted, the Immortal trudged into the kitchen and slammed his sword down onto the small table near the patio doors. "I'm nod buublin! I sduffed ub!" 

Kang tilted his head towards Diane and sighed. "See my problem?" 

She shrugged. "He said that he's stuffed up," she translated, drawing a shocked look from Kang and a grateful one from Duncan. "I raised Lashana, remember? I'm used to deciphering bizarre babbling." 

He paused for a moment, then chuckled. "Good point." Opening a cabinet, he grabbed a pack of decongestants and threw them at the Immortal before returning his attention to Diane, noting that Kalamadea was curled around her shoulders. "You're early, aren't you? Did Lashana just leave you here to wander around aimlessly?" 

"She and Telca went to Wal-Mart for decorations," she told him as she located the sweetener and poured some into her coffee. "Pete's in the livingroom watching hockey, but I'm afraid I lost track of Logan." 

"That's your dog right? He'll turn up. There's nothing in the Palace that'll hurt him.... uh.... unless Xellos gets him." 

Her gaze darkened threateningly. "He wouldn't _dare._" 

"Right. At any rate, he's toned down a little since Lashana became the Chaos Knight. Has to obey her orders, y'know. Wonderful thing that." 

Diane chuckled and sipped at her coffee. "So I heard. Mind filling me in on what else my daughter has been up to?" 

~*~ 

Nightcrawler sighed softly as he paid the total of his purchases, hating how easily his little earnings came and went. He was glad he had gotten what he had been looking for however, and that made the ache of his empty wallet a lot easier, granted, with Lashana and Telca as his friends, he wouldn't be low on money for long, they always had a habit of spoiling him because he was the youngest of the group. Not that he was complaining. 

Grabbing his bag, he got out of the way of a scowling Gungan and looked around, waving to Tvashtar when he spotted the draconid waiting in another line. Knowing better than to teleport around the store, he ran over to the Guardian and grinned at him, eyeing what he was buying curiously. "Why are you buying a brick of silver plated titanium fire opals and sapphires?" Never let it be said that the Universal Wal-Mart's didn't have everything and anything you could be looking for. 

"_That_ is a surprise for everyone," he grinned at the youth, reaching out to ruffle his hair playfully. In truth, all the Harem except for Lashana and Blackwargreymon were behind the most expensive parts of what he was purchasing, it was all a very quietly kept secret. "What'd you get?" 

"Just some cds for Lashana and Telca and a sword polishing kit for Duncan. They were the last three I had to buy for." 

He nodded in understanding. "I just bought Telca's gift yesterday. Never let it be said that women are easy to shop for." 

"We resent that," Lashana protested as she and Telca came up behind him, causing him to yelp in surprise as he spun to look at them. "Y'uh huh. You're up a certain creek without a paddle now, aren't you?" 

"Uhh.... Hi?" 

"Nice try," Telca smirked. 

He sighed in defeat and slumped his shoulders. "Sorry." 

"You should be," Lashana teased, winking at him to let him know that she was just joking with him. "So! Whaddya get me?" 

"Not telling you," he smirked, snapping his tail against the back of her knees as he grabbed his bag and hid it behind his back, shoving his wallet into the back pocket of his blue jeans as he did so. "Did you happen to see my brother?" 

"Nope," Telca answered as the cashier started totalling their purchases, snickering a little at the shocked look the woman held as she stared at the huge amount of lights and decorations that were piled on her conveyor belt. "He can't be far, the store's not that huge." 

Tvashtar sighed and handed his bag to Nightcrawler. "Hold this, and don't let her see it. I'll go find Kadrith and we'll meet you at the car." 

"Funsucker!" Lashana called after him, glancing at Kurt to see if she could wheedle him into letting her see what was in the bag and sighing when his expression told her that it would be a lost cause to try. _Nuts._ Grumbling under her breath, she started transferring bagged items back into her empty cart, watching the total of their purchases as it rose higher and higher. "Glad we have those cards, this looks like it'll cost a mint." 

"It's Christmas," Telca shrugged. "Losing money is part of the holiday."   
  
  


TBC   
  
  



	4. Mistletoe Fears and More Arrivals

_Lashana and Telca own only themselves, Tvashtar, Kadrith, Rryslan, Kalamadea, Akhor and Korin. Tempest owns himself, Rebecca and Eve. Everyone else belongs to someone who isn't us. ^_^_   
  
  
  


Back at the Palace, Malcho was singing Feliz Navidad, his rich baritone voice echoing through the Main Hall as he and Mewtwo begin to set up the decorations, his Spanish accent only adding to the festive nature of the song. As Mewtwo telekenetically drove the tacks into place while he stood in the centre of the room with his arms folded over his chest, the great quetzacoatl happily arranged the lengths of fake evergreen garland and waited for the said tacks to hold one section in place before he went onto the next, never once missing a beat of the song. 

A screech of tires from outside made him pause in mid stanza, pale green eyes darting to the nearest window in time to see the black convertible tear through the gates at breakneck speed. "Muchachos! The amiga's are back!" he called, his voice loud enough to be heard throughout most of the Palace. Another screech drew his attention back to the window in time to see the convertible slip on a patch of ice and begin to spin around in three hundred sixty degree circles as it continued towards the parking lot, and even he could hear the screams of the occupants of that car. 

Seeing that they were about to crash, Mewtwo rose a hand and telekenetically straightened out the car, wincing when it ploughed into a snowbank, barely missing the rear end of the Silver Intrepid as it came to a stop. ~I'm never getting into a car with either of those two ever again,~ he muttered telepathically to Malcho as first Telca then Lashana staggered out of the car, both of them leaning on it heavily to keep from collapsing. The three from the backseat came next, Kadrith dropping to his knees in the snow to hug the ground in relief and thanks, barely avoiding Tvashtar as the other draconid stumbled free. 

"I see that Telca was driving," Blackwargreymon commented as he joined the two at the window, staring out at the group for a moment before going to throw the doors open and heading out to help them with the numerous bags they were pulling from the trunk. "Are you alright?" 

"That was so cool!" Nightcrawler beamed, grinning at Telca excitedly. "I loved how you took that turn out of the parking lot and how we slid sideways around it!" 

"Thanks," Telca smiled. "I did my best." 

"I think I'm gonna hurl," Kadrith groaned. 

"Wuss," Tvashtar muttered as he grabbed a good dozen bags and started for the Palace, wading through another snowbank as he went. 

"Me? I'm not the one who was screaming!" The older of the two brothers protested as he started after the other draconid, blinking when Telca shoved ten bags into his arms, then shoved him forward. 

Grinning with leftover excitement, Nightcrawler grabbed as many bag handles as he could and teleported them all inside, startling Malcho. "Whoops! Sorry, dude. Wow, the place looks great." 

Chuckling, Malcho bowed to the teen. "Gracias amigo. Though Mewtwo and I have just begun." 

"And you've got your work cut out for you too," Blackie announced as he brought in the rest of the bags, adding them to the pile in a corner of the Main Hall. "Did you two buy out the entire store?" 

"Pretty much," Lashana grinned as she hung up her coat in the closet, then ran her hands through her hair. "Brr, it's cold out there. Anyone hear from Wolvie and Zel? Did they find a tree?" 

"Better yet," Telca added. "Do we know if they're still alive?" 

Before Lashana could say anything to that, a ruckus from the kitchen drew her attention, tugging at her curiosity as she went over and peeked inside, grumbling when Blackie came up behind her and pushed her into the room. 

"You can't put bacon on a turkey!" Diane frowned, looking from Duncan to the bird he was dressing in disgust. "That's not how you bake it!" 

"See?! Remy told you it be wrong!" the Cajun boasted smugly. 

"But it's an old recipe!" 

"Gods, not again," the elf whispered as she rose a hand to her head in an exasperated smack. 

"Oh for the love of...." Glaring at Duncan, Telca pushed past the elf and grabbed another turkey out of a portal, dropping it, and the pan it was lying in, in front of Diane. "Here. Have a contest or something. Just stop fighting about how to cook a dead bird!" 

"Hey!" Duncan protested. "How come I had to go hunt for a turkey and you just hand one to her?!" 

"Because she's _my_ mother," Lashana reminded him with a smug look, sticking her tongue out at him when he made a face at her. 

Diane sighed. "Now _children_...." 

"Hullo?!" Wolverine's voice drifted from the Main Hall. "Anyone order a tree?!" 

Grinning, Lashana darted around Blackie and ran out to greet the feral, clapping her hands when she saw the huge tree that Malcho and Mewtwo were setting up in the middle of the Hall, a good ways away from the fireplace to avoid any unpleasantness. "Wolvie, it's _perfect!_ Wait.... Zel? What the hell happened to your pants?!" 

The chimera grumbled. "It's the squirrels fault." 

"What," Telca frowned. "The squirrels molested you?" 

"Oh, that," Wolverine chuckled and jerked a thumb at a blushing Zel. "Squirrels got inta his pants. It was somethin' funny!" 

"Shut up!" the chimera muttered, cheeks flushing as he stomped past the elf and headed upstairs to get changed, yelping when an Alaskan Malamute bowled him over as it ran down the stairs at breakneck speed. 

"Logan?" Worried, Lashana knelt and beckoned the dog closer, sinking her hands into his thick velvety fur as he walked over to her and gave her a lick on her cheek. There was mistletoe attached to his collar, and she frowned as she tugged it loose, toying with the plastic decoration curiously. "What the hell?" 

"Uhh..." Zel, who was still lying on his back from being knocked over, stared up at the mistletoe he was lying under. "Am I in trouble?" 

"_Under the mistletoe!!_" Grinning madly, Xellos flew down the stairs and glomped the chimera, ignoring his cries and attempts to get free as he frenched him, then pulled back and licked his lips. 

"That's just wrong," Telca muttered from the hallway to the kitchen, grimacing as she watched Zel spit and wipe at his mouth with the back of his hand. 

"Yech! Whiskey! I need whiskey!" Coughing in disgust, Zel scrambled to his feet and ran for the kitchen, screaming incoherencies as he went. 

Frowning, Blackwargreymon poked his head out of the kitchen. "Why is Zel chugging whiskey?" he asked, blinking when he saw Xellos smiling widely while Lashana's dog cowered behind the elf's legs. "Nevermind." 

Xellos looked over at the Digimon, when grinned widely. "_Under the mistletoe!_" 

"Oh no you don't!" Lashana yelled, opening a portal in front of Xellos and watching him fly into it. She made sure that the other side of it opened up in mid-town. "Pervert." 

"Everyone watch out for mistletoe," Malcho said shakily, eyeing an annoyed Lashana worriedly. "Amiga, I don't suppose you can order....?" 

"I already ordered him not to ruin Christmas. Ordering him not to be himself would be like telling you to dye yourself bright pink," she sighed. "It just ain't gonna happen. Anyway, let's just decorate the tree and finish off doing all the chores. The others will be showing up sooner than we think. Wolvie, if you want, get Kang to help you with the firewood, kay?" 

"Sure thin' darlin'." Glad to get out of the Palace in case Xellos came back, he quickly headed out to the back where the huge logs rested, waiting to be cut into smaller pieces of firewood. "_Kang!_ Get yer scaled arse out here!!" 

Telca chuckled at Wolvie's yell and smirked at Lashana. "He's definitely one of ours." 

"Yup. And since I hear my mother fighting with Remy and Duncan about stuffing, I'm forgoing venturing into the kitchen. So! Who wants to help me decorate the tree?" 

Grinning, Blackie handed her a bag of decorations. "You know I will. Besides, you need someone to reach the top branches. Shorty." 

"Keep talking like that and you'll be sleeping on the couch tonight," the elf retorted with a smirk, vaguely aware that Nightcrawler had grabbed a bag of outdoor lights and teleported outside as she started unpacking, smiling when Malcho and Mewtwo congratulated Telca on her choice of ornaments, the two digging through the bags eagerly. 

Telca meanwhile turned her attention to the kitchen, rolling her eyes as she walked in on the middle of a fight between Duncan and Diane, the former losing in a spoon fight with the woman, his yelps loud as Lashana's mother smacked him on the knuckles with a wooden spoon. "Way to go, Diane!" she cheered, laughing softly as she walked over to Remy and slid her arms around his waist, snuggling into his chest. "Hi, Remy." 

The Cajun chuckled and returned the hug as best he could, not wanting to dirty her clothes since he had been stuffing his turkey. "Hello, chere. Careful now, I have to finish de turkey, den we cuddle." 

"Ugh," Duncan grimaced, yelping when Diane whacked him again. "Ow! Stop that!" 

"Make me!" 

"Now children," Telca smiled, grinning when Diane _looked_ at her. "What?" Soft humming drew her attention to Kenshin as he went about folding some bread, and she curled a lock of her hair around her right index finger as she walked over to him, eyeing what he was doing. "Hey, Ken-chan." 

Brilliant blue eyes turned to regard her as the samurai smiled. "Konnichiwa, Telca-dono. Are the preparations for tonight going well?" 

"Considering what could happen, yeah, they're going well. I ought to warn you though, watch out for mistletoe. Xellos is feisty today." 

He grimaced at that. "I'll becareful, that I will." 

"Good. Though if he goes for you, feel free to beat him up a bit." She patted him on his shoulder, then turned to look at the other three. "Same goes for you guys, by the way." 

"I can attest to that!" Zel moaned from where he was curled up underneath the small table, a bottle of whiskey in his hands. 

"Yay for you," Duncan muttered. "I had been saving that whiskey since eighteen oh nine." 

"I t'ink he be needin' it more dan you, mon ami," Remy pointed out, glancing over at the double ovens, then to Telca. "Chere, we be an oven short." 

"Eh? Oh crap. Uh... just a sec..." Frowning, she opened a portal and stuck her head inside, peering around curiously before she hauled out a huge toaster oven. "Someone gets to be brave and use this thing." 

"I'll take it," Diane volunteered. "I've cooked with worse before, that ought to be a breeze." 

"Yeah, and it'll come out dryer than a twig," Duncan snickered, ducking the smack Remy aimed at him but not Diane's wooden spoon. "_Ow_...." 

"Serves you right, that it does," Kenshin admonished him. "Diane is our guest. You should give her more respect, that you should." 

"Thank you, Kenshin," Diane smiled, turning to stick her tongue out at Duncan afterwards. 

"Oh yeah," Telca smirked. "We're just oozing maturity in here." Shaking her head sadly, she went and peeked out at the tree decorators, smiling in delighted surprise when she saw how well things were going. "Wow. That looks great!" 

~Doesn't it though?~ Mewtwo said smugly as he took a step back and admired the groups work. The tree was a beautiful mix of gold, silver, deep red, cream and white decorations, some of the more expensive of the ornaments a mix of numerous colours that would shine brightly under the clear lights that had been strung onto the tree. ~We're almost ready to light the tree. Want me to get everyone in here?~ 

"Hell yeah!" Lashana grinned, the expression fading from her face when a red and orange portal opened up near the Main Doors, a black clad form falling through it to land in a heap on the floor. "Uh.... anyone order a vampire?" 

Shaking his head to clear his thoughts from the harsh landing, Angel slowly got to his feet, then looked around, his eyes narrowing when he spotted one of the women who had stolen his car. "You!" Ignoring the others around her, he stalked forward and grabbed fistfuls of her shirt. "Where's my car?!" 

Lashana smiled weakly. "It's safe," she hedged reluctantly. 

"_Where?_" 

"Um.... in a snowbank." 

"_What?!_" 

Tvashtar frowned at the elf. "You stole the car?! Lashana!" 

"What? We needed the seat space!" she protested, smacking Angel upside the head to get him to release her, then straightening her tee shirt when he had done so. "Besides, Telca and I were gonna give it back....eventually." 

Dark eyes narrowed even further as Angel glared at her. "Eventually?" 

"Yes. Eventually. As in, 'not right away'," Telca said, speaking slowly so that Angel could get a clue. 

"Besides, it's built really great! It didn't even get a scratch when we hit that telephone pole," Lashana added cheerfully. 

Angel squeaked. "Telephone pole?!" 

"_Anyway_, 'Two, call the gang and let's light this sucker," the elf smiled as she turned back to the tree, watching as her Bonded placed the star on the top of the tree. "Gods that looks perfect." 

"Hey wait, what about my car?" Angel protested when he realised that the two women were now ignoring him. 

"Well, you can't go get it now, dummy," Telca told him as she and the others from the kitchen gathered into the Main Hall. "It's the middle of the afternoon, you'd turn into a crispy critter, and I don't know of any spells that would prevent you from bursting into flames if you even tried to head outside." 

"Ditto," Lashana added. "You're stuck with us till nightfall. Sorry, bud. _Dad!_ _C'mere!!_" 

Diane winced and scowled at her daughter. "Next time, just go and get him." 

"Where's the fun in that?" 

Kadrith rolled his eyes and added the last ornament onto the tree, stepping back to admire the eight foot tall wonder that they had made, glancing towards the doors when Wolverine and Kang trudged into the Palace, each carrying huge armfuls of firewood that they immediately dumped in the cedar bin near the fireplace. 

"Heard the call. What's up?" the draconian asked, following Lashana's pointing finger to the tree. "Wow. Good job!" 

"We know," Malcho preened, vaguely aware that Angel was now staring at him in slack-jawed shock. "The amiga's chose the ornaments well, don't you agree?" 

"Oh yeah," Wolverine grinned, shaking snow off his worn leather jacket as he walked over and threw an arm around Telca's shoulders. "Ya did good darlin'." 

"Did someone scream?" Pete asked as he poked his head out of the livingroom, meeting his wife's gaze for a moment before shrugging and walking over to join her. "She may get her driving from my side but she get's her lungs from you." 

As Diane delivered a smack upside Pete's head, a cloud of brimstone smoke announced Nightcrawler and Beast's entrance, the two blue furred mutants covered in a light layer of snow. "Dude! We're almost done outside, what's the hold up?" 

~The tree's ready to be lit up,~ Mewtwo told them as he twirled the cord in a hand. ~Who wants to do the honours?~ 

Lashana grinned over at the couple of Remy and Telca. "Telca should," she smiled, leaning back against Blackie as she spoke, hearing his low purr as he wrapped an arm around her. 

Mewtwo smirked and held out the plug to Telca, who blinked a bit before taking it. ~You want a drumroll?~ 

On cue, Kadrith did a rough drumroll against the wall, grinning toothily when his brother rolled his eyes at him. Seeing Telca laugh softly, he repeated the sound, this time drawing it out as she took the plug in one hand and the extension cord in the other. "Five, four, three....." 

"Two!" The group roared, everyone grinning as Telca brought her two hands closer together. "_One!_" 

Yelling out with the others, Telca plugged in the tree, cheering loudly when it glowed brightly, accenting the rich tones of gold, silver and red and glinting off the garland that was tastefully wrapped around the tree. It was simply beautiful, and she smiled as she turned and hugged her Cajun, snuggling into his arms when he returned the embrace and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. 

Grinning, Lashana looked from the couple to the tree, admiring it for a moment before glancing at Angel, who still had a sort of gobsmacked expression on his face as he continued to stare at Malcho in some sort of mind numbing shock. "Oh dear." Pushing away from her Bonded, she walked over to the vampire and poked him in the ribs, drawing his wide eyed gaze. "Malcho's the last of his kind," she told him, drawing the snakes gaze when she spoke his name. "He's a quetzacoatl, one of the legendary creatures of the Aztecs. Though he's far from being that old." 

"Hola amigo." Smiling toothily, Malcho extended his right wing, the pinfeathers of his wing shifting to form a large imitation of a hand, his smile turning into a grin when Angel hesitantly shook 'hands' with him. "Ah, not to worry, amigo, everyone reacts the same upon meeting me for the first time. Señor Pete nearly fainted at the sight of me." 

There was an indignant snort. "I did not!" 

"But, ah, where did you come from?" Angel frowned curiously, still getting used to having a snake that looked capable of swallowing him whole with little trouble being so close to him. 

"The rainforests of my homeland, of course!" 

"No, I mean..." 

Lashana smiled and lay a hand on Angel's arm. "I found him in a different dimension, there was no name for his home, none that we knew of." 

Dark eyes turned to regard her. "A different dimension? Then, that portal back in Los Angeles...?" 

"Oh yeah, Telca and I can open and close those things just like that," she snapped her fingers for emphasis, and grinned. "We're sorceresses, don't'cha know. We got big voodoo here, m'lad." 

He frowned. "Now big?" 

"_Big_," she grinned, her eyes flashing from blue to gold and then back again. "Very big." 

Tvashtar walked over to her and threw an arm around her shoulders. "Lashana, quit trying to freak him out." 

"Aww, ruin all my fun," she chuckled, elbowing her brother playfully, then kneeling to hug the Alaskan malamute that had ventured over to her and was nudging his head against her legs. "Yes, Logan. Big puppy." She grinned as he woofed at her then dropped to the floor and rolled onto his back, letting her scratch his pure white chest as his paws pushed against her arm, his tail wagging happily. 

"Cute," Tvashtar laughed as the dog leapt to his feet then rose up to plant kisses along his muzzle. "Ugh, get off." 

"We're headin' back out!" Nightcrawler waved as he headed for the front door, Beast in tow. "Three more strings of lights and we can come in for hot chocolate." 

"We'll have some waiting for you," Kadrith promised, earning a knowing smile from Telca. Out of the entire Harem, it was Kadrith that was most protective of the young mutant, and while he sometimes got ribbed for it by the others, he knew that both Lashana and Telca approved of his paternal leanings. They weren't far behind him in the protectiveness factor either, not when it came to the young teen. 

"Okay, we have the tree, the food is being cooked, the Main Hall is decorated, outside is almost finished...." Lashana counted the items out on her fingers, then paused and looked at Telca. "Is that it?" 

"Almost. The presents...." she trailed off, then gasped in horror. "Oh my god! I didn't wrap my presents! Shit!" 

Kang paled. "You're supposed to wrap them?! In what?!" 

"Christmas paper," Blackie told him. "What? You didn't know?" 

"No! You people tell me nothing!" 

Telca cursed and stomped upstairs, raving madly. "Stupid, stupid, stupid! Got distracted by cheesy Christmas specials and didn't wrap anything! _Kang!_ C'mon! I'll show you how to wrap presents. Dammit." 

"My she's cheerful," Pete muttered dryly. 

"This is toned down," Wolverine told him with a smirk. "Usually she's way more.... moody." 

"_I heard that, Wolverine!!_" 

The Canuck winced and rose a hand to rub at the back of his neck. "Right. Um.... Hockey?" 

"Hockey," Pete nodded. 

Black hesitated a moment before glancing at Lashana hopefully. 

"Oh, go," she chuckled, shoving him towards the livingroom. "It'll keep you out of trouble." 

"I resent that," he teased, pausing to ruffle her hair lovingly before heading after the guys. 

Laughing, she headed into the kitchen and went to get herself a Pepsi out of the fridge, calmly swatting the reaching tentacles of the Thing aside as she grabbed a can then slammed the door shut. "I can't believe we're all done," she commented, watching Kadrith as he go the hot chocolate ready for Nightcrawler before turning her gaze to her mother and the other two cooks who had put their turkeys into the ovens and were now checking on them religiously. 

"_Under the mistletoe!!_" 

"_Arrrruuugh!!_" 

"I think Xellos just got Wolverine," Tvashtar announced, mirroring Lashana's look of disgust. 

"Better him than us," Duncan commented, ducking the thrown utensil from Lashana but not Kalamadea, who leapt from Diane's shoulders, and clamped onto his ponytail. "Owowowow!" 

"C'mere, Kalama," Lashana snickered, opening her arms to the little dragon and hugging him when he flew over to her. "Having fun so far?" 

::Yeah. I like your mother. She reminds me a lot of you.:: 

"But of course," Diane said proudly. "She is _my_ daughter." 

"That explains the insanity," Zelgadis muttered as he poured himself a cup of coffee, shaking his head sadly when Lashana smacked him, then cried out and clutched at her hand. "One-third golem, remember, Lashana?" 

She scowled as she shook feeling back into her fingers. "I remember," she grumbled sourly, perking up when she heard the doorbell ring, then glancing down at herself. "I'm not festive!" With a snap of her fingers, her outfit changed into black boots, blood red jeans and a iridescent silver blouse, her hair loose and curling around her face as she boosted Kalamadea up onto her right shoulder then bolted for the Main Doors. 

Grinning excitedly, she hauled the doors open and beamed at the waiting Tasuki. "Fang boy!" 

"Elfy!" Having exchanged hated nicknames, he strode forward and enveloped her in a hug, then kicked the door shut and turned to hold her at arms length, studying her. "Ne, ya look wonderful. Life treatin' ya good?" 

"Pretty much. You?" 

"Same as always. Oh, I ran inta some others while I was waitin'...." he turned to look at the doors as they were pushed open by a certain Arch-Angel, the male rubbing at his face as he walked into the Palace. 

"Thanks a lot Tasuki," Tempest muttered sourly as he tested his aching nose, glad to discover that it wasn't broken. Ever the gentleman, he turned and held the door open for his wife, Rebecca and his daughter, Eve before shoving it closed and gazing over at the elf. "Well, well, well. Haven't seen you around for a while. Your invitation came out of the blue." 

"I've been busy," Lashana shrugged evasively, glancing at Tasuki as he threw a protective arm around her shoulders. Rolling her eyes, she pulled away and went to greet her friends, smiling at Tempest as she gave him a friendly hug, then turned to the other two women. "Missed you guys. Becca, you look beautiful as always. Eve, it's been a while, did you do something with your hair?" 

"Eh? Oh, no, I just decided to let my hair down, that's all." Returning the elf's warm smile, Eve leaned forward and gave her a hug before studying her curiously. "You look good. A little tired though." 

"And your aura's a little off," Rebecca frowned, eyeing the elf worriedly. "Anything you want to tell us about?" 

"Ah, let's just leave it for now, hmm? It's nothing serious, just getting over a bad few months. C'mon into the kitchen y'all. Telca's up wrapping last minute presents and Blackie and some of the guys are watchin' hockey." 

"I saw Nightcrawler and Beast outside," Tempest smiled. "They're doing a good job, the Palace looks great, as does the tree." He paused to admire the large decoration before returning to her side with a few quick paces. "Your folks here?" 

"Yup. Dad's watchin' hockey and Mom somehow got herself into a turkey contest with Remy and Duncan." Chuckling softly, she held open the door to the kitchen and yelled into the room. "Everyone look lively! We got us some company!" 

The kitchen turned into a confusing mass of people as everyone rushed to greet each other, and Lashana happily stood at the sidelines as she watched, content for the moment to just enjoy the little bit of peace she was being given. 

Peace, however, was far from Telca's mind as she rummaged through the attic to retrieve a few rolls of wrapping paper before throwing them down the stairwell, smirking when she heard Kang yelp in surprise. Grabbing a bag of bows, she made her way down to rejoin the draconian, rolling her eyes at the glare he gave her. "Chill out, Kang." 

"What is the point of wrapping things in paper?" he frowned as he followed her, the rolls of festive paper tucked under one arm. 

"The point is that it's a Christmas tradition and because I said so." 

He grumbled but didn't say anything, calmly following her back downstairs and to the game room, where she dumped the bows on the pool table, then started pulling things out of a portal. Still unsure, he set all but one roll onto the table, choosing one particular pattern that he liked most out of the choices. 

"Gimme that one," Telca frowned as she looked around for the tape, eyes narrowing when he didn't hand the roll over. "Give it." 

"No. I like it. If I have to wrap these things like you say I do, I at least want to choose a pattern that I like!" 

"A gentleman would give a lady the roll of paper." 

Kang smirked. "Lucky for me that you're no lady." 

"Give me that damn paper!" Snarling, Telca lunged at him, the two vanishing into a dust cloud as he tried to grapple with her. 

Hearing the racket and the sounds of numerous threats of bodily harm, Wolverine poked his head into the room and sighed at the sight of the two fighters, watching the battle for a moment before deciding to interfere. "Hey!" Wading into the fray, he grabbed a spare roll of wrapping paper and beat both of them over the head with it. "It's _Christmas_ ya idiots! Behave!" 

Rubbing at her head, Telca sent Wolvie an angry glare and huffed. "Figures you'd take his side. Hmpft. Men." 

"Darlin', I ain't taking _any_ side," the Canuck told her. "I jus' want ya'll ta stop this stupidity. Some of us 're tryin' ta watch the game!" 

"The _game,_" Telca grumbled. "Of _course._ The _game._" 

Seeing an opportunity, Kang whacked her with the roll of paper, then snatched the tape and made a run for it, chuckling when he heard Telca's scream of anger. 

Hearing the scream, Lashana walked out into the Main Hall in time to see Kang race up the stairs, the draconian taking them four at a time. Telca barrelled out of the game room moments later, eyes wild and amber as she looked around.   


"Where is he?" she demanded angrily. "Where is that two-timing scaled--" 

"Dunno. Didn't see him," Lashana lied with a shrug. "I just heard you scream, everything okay?" 

Telca sighed and reached up to brush her bangs off her forehead. "Yeah. Peachy. How's it goin' in there?" 

"The three turkey cookers are at each other's throats, Tempest and co. think my entire family is nuts, and I think we're scarring Kadrith." 

"So everything's normal then." 

"Yup." 

"Kewl." Grinning, Telca burst into the kitchen, arms wide open. "Chicken-boy! How are ya?!" 

"Battle-axe!" Inwardly hating that nickname but still happy to see her, Tempest gave her a friendly hug. "You're looking well! I heard you and Remy officially became a couple." 

"Yeah," smiling, she looked over at Remy, who winked at her. "Yeah, we did." 

"Ah, young love," Becca sighed wistfully, smiling when Diane echoed her sigh. "They don't have a clue what they're getting into." 

"When it comes to these two girls, I think they'll handle whatever comes their way," Diane mused, seeing her daughter lean up against Tvashtar's side and playfully nudge him in the ribs, watching as he laughed and returned the gesture while wrapping an arm around her shoulders. 

Rebecca smiled and followed the other woman's gaze. "You know, I think you're right." 

"There's a first," Duncan mumbled under his breath, yelping when Kadrith hissed and smacked him upside the head while Kenshin gave him a nasty glare. "What?" 

Eve sighed. "Pitiful." 

"He is, isn't he?" Remy smirked, enjoying the Immortal's plight and his inability to retaliate in front of all who were gathered. 

"_Under the mistletoe!!_" 

"_Mraaaffffff!!_" 

"And Xellos claims another victim," Telca sighed, snickering at the look on Tempest's face. "What? As if you weren't expecting something like this to happen. It's Xellos. Actually, I was expecting a lot worse than this." 

Tempest opened his mouth, then paused and closed it again, deciding not to tempt fate. 

"It's true. Last year he showed up naked except for a single holly leaf that didn't quite cover all." Lashana shuddered at the memory and glanced up at Tvashtar. "Be glad you missed that." 

"Oh, I am," he assured her. 

"I think I am too," Tempest shuddered, grimacing at the bad mental image. "Either way, we'll be sure to avoid the mistletoe this year." 

"Oh don't worry, love," Rebecca smiled at her husband, a rather predatory smile. "He won't get you." 

As teasing catcalls echoed through the kitchen, Tempest fought down a blush, then glared at the snickering duo of Lashana and Telca. "As if you two should talk." 

"We said nothing," Telca smiled innocently, swatting at Kadrith when he snorted. "Isn't that right, Elfy?" 

"Nope. Not a word," the elf grinned broadly. "Not one word at all." 

"You didn't have to say it," Eve laughed. "Your expressions were more than enough!" 

"Damn," Lashana teased, "they know us too well." Grinning, she winked at Tempest, who chuckled and shook his head in return, obviously amused at their antics. Tvashtar gave her a gentle hug then before pulling away and heading out of the kitchen, and a quick telepathic conversation with Kalamadea sent the little dragon after him, drawing her mother's curious gaze. 

"Something wrong?" Diane asked worriedly, seeing the look in her daughter's eyes. 

Lashana smiled and shook her head. "Nope. Everything's fine. Just making sure Tvashtar's okay, he's been in the dumps lately, s'all." 

"Why?" Eve frowned. "What's wrong with him?" 

"We just passed the day when he was put into Serenica's service," Kadrith rumbled softly, tail lashing. "It still haunts him." 

Diane frowned and looked over at Lashana, who had a dark faraway look to her. "Is this something else you haven't told me?" 

The Elf glanced at her, then sighed. "Tvashtar is Immortal. He's been serving the Chaos Knights for over a millennia. Fifty years ago he went into the service of Serenica. It was bad enough that all of the Knights had treated him as an animal.... but she tortured him. Along with other things that I will not mention here. He still has nightmares about her." She paused, then glanced from Telca to her mother. "That's why I gave him asylum when he first came here, because I wanted to make sure that no one would do that to him ever again." 

Diane stayed silent for a moment, then smiled slightly. "I always knew you had a big heart, Lashana. Despite your efforts to hid it." 

"Stubborn as a mule. It's why I like her so much," Telca grinned. "She's just like me." 

Kadrith chuckled and looked over at his Avatar. "I have to say, out of all the Gaia Avatar's I've been assigned to, you certainly are my favourite of the lot." 

"Our sorceresses are unique, that they are," Kenshin smiled as he checked on the loaf of bread he was making using the breadmaker, a contraption that had been bought by his request. "That is what makes them so lovable, that it is." 

Telca exchanged glances with Lashana. "We're nubbed." 

"That we are," the elf smiled. "That we are." 

"_Under the mistletoe!!_" 

"Oh, no you don't! _Chaos orb!_" 

"_Fireball!_" 

Eyes wide, Lashana and the others inched over to the swinging door, peeking out into the Main Hall in time to see the two spells slam into Xellos, sending him flying. Two dark forms came into their line of sight then, one much bigger than the other, dark skin shining with an odd dark blue iridescence as pale blue eyes fixed on them, widening in surprise. 

"Lashana, who is that?" Diane asked, eyeing the tall draconid. 

"_That_ is Rryslan. Tvashtar and Kadrith's father. That's another long story, so don't ask right now, kay?" 

Smirking, Telca elbowed Tempest. "_You_ remember him right? After all, you did fight him once, over something that was later revealed to be nothing." 

"Nothing!" Tempest glared at the elf. "He insulted Rebecca!" 

"It's not an insult if the one insulted doesn't take it personally," Telca pointed out with a knowing look to Becca. "Besides, there's no way in hell you two are decking it out today. You do, and I'll kick both yer arses from one end of the universe to the other. Twice." 

Lashana grinned at Tempest nastily. "And I'll help." Doing a rapid mood shift, she smiled and walked out to meet Rryslan, rolling her eyes when he bowed to her. "Please don't do that. I've told you dozens of times that you don't have to do that, Rryslan. We're all equals here." 

"Speak for yourself!" Telca huffed. "I personally think that people should bow to me all the time." 

"In your dreams, m'dear," Diane chuckled, drawing Rryslan's gaze. 

Tvashtar smirked and stepped forward, ignoring Kalamadea who was perched on his shoulder. "Rryslan, this is Diane. Lashana's mother." There was the sensation of hot breath against the back of his knees, and he turned to look down at the happy Alaskan Malamute. "And this is their dog. Logan, don't slobber on me." 

"C'mere, puppy," Lashana said cheerfully, patting her thigh to draw the dog forward. "Wanna go outside and play in the snow? Yeah? C'mon." 

::I'll keep an eye on him,:: Akhor said as he flew out of the living room and soared after her. ::Your father's watching hockey and it's getting all cult-like in there.:: 

She laughed at that and opened the patio door, wincing at the gust of cold wind that hit her head on as the dog and the dragon headed out into the snow. "Stay where I can sense you!" she called out to Akhor, who nodded as he flew past her. Shivering, she closed the door and rubbed warmth back into her arms. "Brr, I hate the cold. Give me Cancun any day." 

"I like the snow," Diane protested. "Personally, I think a good twenty inches more would be perfect." 

"_No!_" Telca and Lashana cried in horror, making Diane roll her eyes in exasperation. 

"Lashana-chan...." 

Hearing Xellos' voice but not seeing him, the elf looked around her warily, seeing the others do the same. "What Xel?" she asked, going very still when the sensation of lips against her ear sent a shiver down her back.   


"Under the mistletoe," he whispered, becoming visible as he spoke, eyes wide open and glittering like amethysts. 

Horrified, she looked up, saw the damnable plastic decoration, then looked at her guests. "I'll be right back!" she yelled as she bolted from the kitchen, an amorous Xellos at her heels as she dashed through the Palace, screaming in horror and panic. 

"I hope she outruns him," Rryslan said with a shudder, listening to the screams and explosions echo through the Palace as the elf tried to escape the Mazoku. 

"She will," Telca told them. "Eventually." 

"Should we not go and help her?" Kenshin asked curiously as a particularly terrified shriek was heard. 

"She can handle herself," Kadrith shrugged, glancing at his brother afterwards. "Right?" 

"_Aaaiiiiieeeee! Fireball!!_" 

"Oh Gods," Tvashtar muttered as her scream echoed through the Palace, "I hope so." 

"She'll be _fine,_" Telca grinned as she walked over to Remy and hugged him, sighing happily when he wrapped her up in his arms. "She's handled worse." 

"Like what?" Tempest challenged. 

"Xellos on Viagra, Xellos at Halloween when he went as 'Lust', need I say more?" 

"Ugh, no," Eve grimaced. "Please. No." Desperate to change the topic, she looked around the kitchen. "So! What else needs to be done for the supper?" 

"Plenty!" Diane smiled, going to rummage through the drawers for a moment before handing her a potato peeler and pointing to a twenty pound bag of taters. "Start peeling." 

Eve made a face. "I'm glad I asked," she muttered dryly.   
  
  
  


TBC   
  
  
  



	5. Christmas Eve Concussions

_Lashana and Telca own only themselves, Tvashtar, Kadrith, Rryslan, Kalamadea, Akhor and Korin. Tempest owns himself, Rebecca and Eve. Everyone else belongs to someone who isn't us. ^_^_   
  
  
  
  
  


"Shoot. _Shoot!_" Wolverine, Tasuki, Blackie, Zelgadis and Pete yelled at the TV in unison as the Ottawa Senator's put up an offensive on the opposing team, the two hockey fans cheering their team on even though the Sens couldn't hear them. 

Just as the second period ended without their team getting a goal, a white haired blur burst into the room and attached herself to Blackwargreymon with enough force to send him, and the chair he was sitting in, crashing to the floor. Eyebrow arched, Pete glanced over the back of the couch at the couple. "Lashana, what are you doing?" 

"Hiding from Xellos!" she cried as she burrowed into Blackie's arms, hampering his attempts to get up. "He caught me under the mistletoe and I've been running from him for the past half hour! Didn't you people hear me screaming?!" 

"We were kinda caught up in the game," Blackie said apologetically as he slowly got to his feet, then righted the Lazy-Boy chair, cradling her in his arms as he sat down again and sat her sideways across his lap. 

"Oh no you don't," Pete frowned, reaching over to pull his daughter away from the Digimon and then making her sit on the couch next to him, sending a warning glare at Blackie as he did so. "Hands off my daughter." 

"_Dad,_" she groaned as she got back up and went to rejoin her Bonded. "For Gods sake, you bloody well _know_ that we're a couple." 

Pete grumbled under his breath but didn't say anything, not wanting to let it be known that he still thought of her as his little girl. Instead he turned back to the game and scowled, at least he did before Lashana whacked him with a pillow. "Don't start something you can't finish." 

"I don't think that's an issue with her," Tasuki chuckled. 

She snickered and leaned against Blackie, resting her head back on his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her waist, being very careful since he was constantly under Pete's gaze. As the next period started, he got to see how much of a hockey fan she truly was, and he chuckled softly as he listened to her cheer on her favourite team, even going as far as to out cheer Wolverine and her father. 

"You know, I was coming here to comment on the testosterone, but it seems that plan's gone awry," Eve commented as she walked into the livingroom with Kadrith by her side, rolling her eyes when the draconid grinned at the sight of the game on the TV and vaulted over the back of the couch to land in the empty spot next to Pete. "Lashana, is there a reason you're in here?" 

"Safe from, Xellos," the elf smiled as she snuggled back against her Bonded, hearing his low protective rumble as he tightened his hold on her. 

"Yes, well, Nightcrawler and Beast want you and Telca to come look at the lights outside." 

She paused in mid cheer, then sighed and nodded, pulling away from Blackie with a quick kiss to his cheek. "I'll come check out the game before supper, if I have the time," she promised as she headed after Eve, pausing to grab her coat before going outside, laughing when she saw Akhor and Logan playing around out front. Seeing her mother and the others gathered a little ways away, she walked over to them, then turned to look at the Palace, her breath leaving her in a gasp of joy when she saw the lights that decorated the building. Around every window and every roof's edge, there were white lights mixed with a rainbow's range of colours. A great green wreath hung glowing over the main doors, a red bow made of lights adding to it's beauty, and she couldn't help but go and give both Beast and Kurt great hugs. "Guys, it looks beautiful!" 

Telca grinned as she nodded, going to hug Beast as Lashana extended a bit of her coat around a slightly shivering Nightcrawler, trying to warm him, though if one could tell by his smile, he didn't feel the cold at all. "As beautiful as this is, let's all head inside for some hot chocolate." 

Tempest nodded eagerly. "When do we eat?" 

"Stop thinking with your stomach, love," Rebecca chuckled, playfully elbowing him. "We'll eat soon enough." 

"Very true, my dear, but I believe that a nice hot cup of cocoa would be much appreciated," Beast smiled. "Even with this fur, the wind still carries a chill." 

"That reminds me," Diane said, pausing at the doors. "Logan! Come boy!" 

When the dog didn't heed her call, Lashana turned and planted her hands on her hips. "_Logan! _Don't make me go out there!" Almost faster than one could blink, there was an Alaskan Malamute sitting in front of her, with a small white dragon perched on the top of his head. Smiling, she looked over at her mother. "I have more practice at getting my way." 

"Do tell." 

She shrugged with an embarrassed grin. "What can I say? It's a gift." 

"Not to interrupt on your boasting," Telca smirked. "But where the hell did Angel get to?" 

"Oh my God! Angel! I completely forgot about him!" Throwing her jacket into the closet, Lashana turned to look at Telca. "I'll go check upstairs, can you look around down here?" 

"Sure thing! I just hope Xellos didn't get to him!" 

"There's a scary thought," Tempest shuddered. 

"I know!" Lashana agreed as she spun and bolted up the stairs, taking them two at a time. Already she had contacted Korin, who had been sleeping after gorging on chocolate, and as the little dragon telepathically scanned the Palace for the vampire, Lashana reached the second floor and started searching through all of the rooms, growling in annoyance when she uncovered nothing. 

Sighing, she headed to the third floor, repeating the search with the same results. She was just about ready to start pulling her hair out when Korin relayed the information that Angel was in the library, the message making her grin as she bolted up more stairs, this time with a real purpose. 

The small dragon met her at the doors, and she paused long enough to let him land on her right shoulder before she pushed the heavy doors open, her gaze cutting across the room before settling on Angel, who was just about to open one of her Chaos spell books. "Angel! No!" Knowing that the wards on the book would probably fry him, she dashed forward and snatched it out of his hands just as golden black power started to expand from the books pages, searching for the intruder that had dared to try to read from it. "Some of the books in here don't like being read by strangers." 

::That's putting it lightly,:: Korin smirked as Lashana replaced the wards on the book, the golden lightning that had been playing over it's cover fading in her hands as she returned it to the shelf. 

"Giant snakes, portals, books that attack...." Angel shook his head and sent a baffled look at her. "What are you people?" 

She shrugged. "Interesting?" At the look he gve her, she sighed and leaned against a bookshelf, folding her arms over her chest. "The short rundown is this. Telca and I are Avatars, we have two Immortal Guardians, and the rest of the Guys here are our friends, come together from a melee of various dimensions. My turn. How the hell did you find the library? No newcomer ever finds their way to the library without some sort of help." 

"The snake--"   


"Quetzacoatl." 

"Whatever. Gave me the nickel tour." 

"Did he? Nuts. Where'd he go?" 

Angel shrugged. "He said something about having to meet with 'Tvashtar'." 

A pure white eyebrow arched at that. "Did he now. Hmpft. People are planning things behind my back. I don't like it when they do that." 

::I'd think that you'd be used to it by now,:: Korin sent to her, falling silent when she glared at him. He had, however, now gained the attention of Angel, who was gaping at him in shock. ::Yes, I'm a dragon. Take a picture, it'll last longer.:: 

"Manners aren't his forté," Lashana said by way of apology. "Now c'mon. It's Christmas, and there's no way you're spending it up here in the Library. I'm sure Beast could whip up some sort of blood protein something for you to drink. Or do you eat? I can't remember." 

He still wasn't over that whole Avatar thing, so he actually answered without thinking. "I can, a little." 

"Good. Supper's almost ready anyway. And it's sunset, you'll be able to go dig out your car soon." 

His eyes widened. "Dig out?!" 

"I told you it was in a snowbank, didn't I?" she said flippantly as she grabbed his arm and started to drag him out of the library, yelling out to Kang as Korin relayed that the draconian was in his room. "_Kang!_ Supper's gonna be on soon! Hurry it up!" Ignoring Angel's baffled protests, she opened a portal and pulled him through it, emerging into the kitchen. "Found 'im. Almost got himself fried by reading one of my spellbooks." 

Kadrith frowned at the vampire. "Don't you know that snooping around and reading warded spellbooks is dangerous?" 

"I didn't know they were warded!" Angel protested, jerking his arm out of the elf's hold. "This place is nuts!" 

Telca rolled her eyes. "Well _duh._" 

"Now Telca, don't freak him out more than he already is," Diane scolded her lightly, she being one of the only people who _could_ scold the other sorceress and not get blasted for it. 

"Ruin all my fun," Telca muttered sourly. 

"Now Telca, tis the season," Beast reminded her as he sipped at his hot chocolate, thanking Kenshin when the samurai handed him a Twinkie. "Besides, the poor lad looks positively shell shocked." 

"What book was he looking through?" Rebecca asked curiously as she handed out hot chocolate to everyone. 

"The one with the Giga Slave in it," Lashana said flippantly, ignoring the looks of horror from Eve, Tempest and Rebecca. "Luckily I stopped him before my wards opened a small portal inside of him and portaled his heart into that demonic dimension." 

Tempest sweatdropped. "Couldn't you just have a basic locking spell?" 

Lashana blinked. "Where's the uniqueness in that?" 

"Okaaay...." Shaking her head, Eve turned her attention to the three cooks who were keeping a close eye on the turkeys and watched as Diane opened the monster toaster oven and basted the bird. "Oh, that smells wonderful!" 

"You wait till you taste de turkey dat, Remy, made," the Cajun boasted. "It be better dan anyone elses!" 

"Fat chance! " Duncan shot back. 

Nightcrawler sighed and shook his head, glancing over at a smirking Tempest. "You're lucky, you get to leave. We have to live with him." 

"Hey! I resent that!" the Immortal protested. 

Telca sighed and rose a hand to massage her aching temple while Kadrith went to check on the potatoes that were being cooked in a huge pot, soon to be turned into mashed taters. Baby carrots and peas were cooking in two more separate pots, simmering nicely. "How long till we eat?" 

"About twenty minutes," Rebecca answered as she gathered utensils then followed Lashana into the dining room, helping the elf to set the huge table. Cloth napkins were set out with the good silver, beautiful white candles lit and the good china taken out of the hutch to be used for the meal, a centrepiece of holly and poinsettias taking it's place between the two candles. Kenshin brought out the freshly baked loaf of bread moments later, the thick slices of bread smelling wonderful as he set the two baskets at either end of the table, along with two small glass bowls with cuts of butter in them. 

It had already been agreed that Pete would carve the turkey that Diane had made while Wolverine would take over the cutting of Duncan's bird. The Cajun, it had been decided, could be trusted not to maul the turkey with a blade. As Kadrith took on the task of mashing the potatoes, Lashana spooned the baby carrots into a large bowl, then repeated the procedure with the peas, bringing both bowls to the table afterwards.   


Word of supper being readied had already spread through the Palace, and various people had already begun to mill into the dining room and take seats, Pete sitting at the head of the table while Wolverine sat at the other end, and Telca smirked at the sight as she ushered Eve and Tempest into the room, letting them take whichever seats they pleased, though it was full knowledge that the seat on Tempest's right belonged to Rebecca. 

Knowing that the two sorceresses had planned for everyone to have a nice glass of white wine with the meal, Nightcrawler bamfed down to the basement, where the large walk-in freezer was built into a wall. Humming a cheerful tune, he yanked the door open and headed inside, looking around for a moment before locating the bottles that had been bought specifically for this meal and quickly grabbing them. 

A glint of ice drew his gaze then, and he frowned as he turned to look at the odd sculpture that was in the middle of the freezer, the opaqe ice looking eerie in the bright light of the room. Shrugging, he turned and walked out into the warmth of the Palace before kicking the door shut and teleporting himself back upstairs, handing the bottles to Telca. "Did you guys order an ice sculpture?" 

"Ice sculpture?" she echoed "Nooo. Why?" 

"Well, there's this weird sculpture downstairs in the walk-in-freezer. It looked kinda weird." 

"What's this?" Lashana frowned. "A sculpture?" 

"Yeah," Kurt told her. "I could have sworn there was a cape frozen inside of it. Like Count Chocula." 

Lashana and Telca exchanged horrified looks. "_David!_" Frantic, Telca threw open a portal and dove into it, Lashana at her heels as the two emerged in the basement, the former of the two throwing the freezer door open to revel their sculpturesque friend frozen in a thick layer of ice. 

"When was he supposed to get here?!" Lashana asked as she put her shoulder against the side of the cube and shoved, sliding David out of the freezer and out into the basement. 

"I don't know! Maybe two hours ago?" Worried, Telca conjured up a fireball and started melting the ice, quickly growing impatient and merely expanding the spell until it encompassed the entire block of ice, melting it rapidly. It wasn't until the defrosted David slumped to the floor that she banished the spell, moving to help Lashana pick him up as she opened another portal, the two of them carrying him into the kitchen where Beast was already waiting with a cup of hot chocolate and a thick blanket. 

Knowing that Beast had medical training that they didn't, Lashana gently set David down on a chair then stepped back, letting Beast check his vitals as everyone in the kitchen stood still, waiting worriedly for the mutant's diagnosis. 

"Uuuhhh, what hit me?" 

The disoriented groan brought cheers from the group as David slowly blinked light blue eyes at Beast, then turned to look at the two sorceresses. "Am I late for dinner?" 

~*~ 

"So, tell me," Rryslan said to Tvashtar as they took seats at the table, waiting for the three turkeys to be brought out. "Why is your Avatar so enamoured with this holiday?" 

"I dunno. Probably because it's a holiday where family and friends get together and celebrate. She's always liked festivities like that." Tvashtar replied, looking up with a smile when the topic of their conversation joined them and sat next to him. "Heyla, kelestra. Everything okay?" 

"Everything's perfect!" she grinned excitedly. "David's thawed out, the turkeys are ready, everyone's here.... it's perfect!" 

"Yeah," Tasuki added. "I gotta admit, Elfy, you and Telca sure know how ta throw a party!" 

Her grin widened at that, and she looked at Blackie happily as he took his seat beside her, his hand immediately darting under the table to take hers, his thumb rubbing against the back of her hand in a tender gesture, and she glanced at her father to make sure he wasn't looking before she rose up to give her Bonded a quick kiss, returning his smile when he purred at her lovingly. 

Telca and Remy joined the group then, the couple linked arm in arm as they moved to sit across from Blackie and herself, Remy pulling out the chair for Telca before returning into the kitchen. When Malcho had finally joined them, the large quetzacoatl curled up in the far corner but well within the reach of the table, Diane, Duncan and Remy brought out the turkeys, receiving appreciative claps and hoots from those gathered at the table. 

Everyone waited until the three had seated themselves before everyone rose their glasses in a respectful toast, Telca's voice rising above everyone elses. 

"To friends and family forever. May we all annoy each other and grow old together!" 

"Here here!" Kang grinned before everyone clinked glasses against their partner's glasses. "Now let's eat!" 

The three carvers stood at that, taking mock bows before picking up knives or in Wolverine's case, extending his metal claws. 

Mass chaos ensued. 

"Yo! Pass the bread!" 

"Rryslan, stop hogging the mashed potatoes!" 

"Can someone pass the gravy?" 

"Yipe! Watch the candles! Watch the candles!" 

"NO! Don't put the flames out with the wine you idiot!" 

"Lovely. I guess the carrots are going to be 'a la flambé." 

"They're only a little singed." 

"Good thing we never use this tablecloth." 

"Hey! Can we get some turkey down at this end?" 

"Why does this turkey taste like bacon?" 

"See? See? Remy told you dat puttin' de bacon on de turkey was a bad idea!" 

"Oh shut up!" 

"Don't you tell my Remy to shut up!" 

"Telca, don't throw your fork at, Duncan." 

"Stay out of this, David." 

"Lashana, don't encourage her." 

"But mom, all I did was smack, Duncan!" 

"Definitely from your side of the family." 

"Shut up, dear." 

"_This_ is the family you've been adopted into?" 

"I never said it was a normal family, Rryslan." 

"Hey, Tempest, isn't you eating turkey some sort of cannibalism?" 

"Oh, har har har, Kang. Veeery funny. Eve! Stop laughing!" 

~Malcho! Don't eat half a turkey!~ 

"But amigo! There's plenty left for all of you!" 

"Not if Kadrith keeps eating all those mashed potatoes." 

"But they're good!" 

"Some of us would like to try them then!" 

"Lashana! Don't you dare feed the dog at the table!" 

"Me?! Hello? Dad? Who's been sneaking him table scraps since we started eating?!" 

"She's got you there, Pete." 

"Lashana! Get Kalamadea out of the peas!" 

"Ack! Korin! Get your own drumstick, this one's mine!" 

::I sunk my teeth into it first, Blackie.:: 

All in all, it was a festive sort of controlled mayhem. Jokes were told, stories about past Christmases shared, and by the end, when everyone was full and happy, a burping contest was unofficially called, most of the women grimacing in disgust. That is until Lashana won the contest. One small step for an elf, one big leap for women-kind. Not. 

In the end, Telca magicked up a fire-whip and made all the males clean up the table before she joined the poker game that Rebecca had started, the women snickering at the groans that came from the men as they cleaned up and did the dishes. Though the game didn't last long. After the fifth hand that Telca had won, the rest decided to give up while they were still partially ahead and retired to the Main Hall, where chairs and sofa's had been set up near the tree and fireplace. 

Angel, who had just seen that it was dark outside, immediately bolted for the front doors, pausing only long enough to grab a shovel out of the closet before throwing himself outside, calling out to his car in a loving tone as he started shovelling in a random snowbank, fully prepared to spend all night digging for his beloved convertible. 

"Poor guy," Lashana murmured, glancing over at Telca. "Think we should tell him what snowbank his car is in?" 

Telca leaned back in the sofa and peered out the closest window. "Nah. He's already digging in the right spot. He should hit paydirt in a few more shovels." 

True to form, two minutes later a loud 'clang' was heard, followed by an whoop of joy, and Rebecca chuckled at the sound. "You two are terrible." 

"I taught this one well," Diane smiled as she hugged her daughter, who chuckled softly. 

"Are we allowed to join you or are we still on dish duty?" Kang asked as he poked his head out of the kitchen, eyeing the gathered women warily. 

"Well that depends," Eve said. "Is the kitchen clean? Is the dining room?" 

"Yes to both." 

"Hmm. Well, I dunno.... whatddya think, Lashana?" 

"Gee, I'm not sure...." 

Annoyed, Tempest shoved Kang out of the way and glared. "This, is not funny."   


"Not to you, dear," Rebecca chuckled. "But you're free. Come sit down." 

"_Finally_," he muttered under his breath, walking over to them and dropping down next to his wife, huffing slightly. The rest of the males, seeing that he had gotten free without a bludgeoning, followed suit, milling out of the kitchen and joining the women. In the end, Lashana chose to sit on the floor with her Bonded, her back against his side as he slipped an arm around her to hug her to him. Nighcrawler, Kadrith and Wolverine had one couch, Tempest, Rebecca and Eve another, and Diane, Pete and Rryslan the third. The rest of the group had either dragged chairs out from the dining room or had gone native and chosen to sit on the floor. 

"So," Tasuki said after everyone had settled themselves. "What now?" 

"Sleep," Lashana mumbled, leaning against her Bonded and smiling when he purred and rubbed his hand over her back. 

"No. Not sleep," the bandit smirked, chuckling at the face she made. "What's for dessert?" When half the people gathered groaned in mixed horror and disbelief, he huffed and folded his arms over his chest, leaning back in the chair as he slouched. 

"Well, we could do gifts," Nightcrawler suggested. 

"No. Gifts are given out on Christmas morning! Not before," Telca said sternly, leaning back into Remy's hold as he put an arm around her shoulders, his fingers toying with the collar of her blouse. Smiling, she tilted her head back and murmured his name, nearly purring when he leaned down and kissed her. 

"So are we to lounge about and bask in the afterglow of our gorging?" Beast asked teasingly, blinking when Wolverine pulled out a stogie and said that his idea was a good one. "I was merely jesting, Wolverine." 

"I wasn't," the feral grinned, reaching over to use the fireplace to light his stogie. 

"Seriously," Diane frowned. "What do we do? Small talk?" 

"Sure," Rryslan smirked. "I always wanted to know. _How_ did you manage to raise such a child as _that?_" And he pointed to Lashana, who glared and started to get up to whack him, only Blackie held her back. 

"Patience. Lots of patience," Pete answered fondly. 

"She was the most stubborn thing I had ever seen," Diane added. 

"Um, excuse me," David hedged. "Was? No, no. _Is._" 

Lashana glared. "Hey! I resemble that remark!" Muttering sourly, she slumped back against her Bonded, only lessening her glare when Logan walked over to her and snuffled at her hands, his tail wagging happily as he dropped to the floor and wriggled closer to her, begging to be petted. 

"That dog has no shame," Kang smirked as he watched Lashana reach over to scratch Logan's belly and chest, her fingers vanishing into his thick white fur. 

"Can ya blame 'im. Lookit the attention he's gettin'," Wolverine chuckled. "Hey Kang, mebbe if ya threw yerself to tha floor Lashana'd scratch yer belly." 

"Not on your life," Blackwargreymon growled dangerously, eliciting snickers from Tempest and Rebecca. 

Diane chuckled and was about to tease Blackie a bit more when an odd sound caught her attention, making her sit straighter as she strained her hearing, vaguely aware that Logan had flipped to his feet and was growling lowly as he faced the fireplace. 

Reacting to her dog's change in attitude, Lashana got to her feet and approached the fireplace, pausing when she saw soot raining down upon the fire. "Everyone get back!" she ordered, glad to see that Tempest and Rebecca had taken charge and ushered everyone away while she and Telca stood before the group, ready to defend against anything. She just hoped it wasn't another demon come to Challenge her for the position of Chaos Knight. Having to fight like that in front of her parents on Christmas Eve was not something she wanted to do. 

Tensing as the sound of something grating on the walls of the fireplace was heard, Telca reached into a portal and pulled out her battle-axe, seeing Lashana copy her as the elf drew her sword out of her own storage portal, the two of them dropping into fighting stances, both of them ready to attack the moment they had a target. 

An avalanche of soot smothered the flames and sent a cloud of dust into the Main Hall then, blinding the worried onlookers as both Lashana and Telca let out war cries, the sound of a struggle making Tempest blindly run into the fray to help his friends as David, Zelgadis, Eve, and Rebecca readied magickal spells with which to defend the large group of people behind them. 

In the end it was Diane that wove the wind spell that cleared the dust from the air, clearing everyone's sight and revealing a rather startling sight. 

"Oh my god!" Nightcrawler cried, looking at Lashana and Telca in horror as he pointed to the limp form on the floor. "You killed Santa Clause!"   
  
  


  
TBC  
  



	6. Merry Christmas to All!

_Lashana and Telca own only themselves, Tvashtar, Kadrith, Rryslan, Kalamadea, Akhor and Korin. Tempest owns himself, Rebecca and Eve. Everyone else belongs to someone who isn't us. ^_^_   
  
  
  
  
  


Tasuki's eyes widened as he lowered his tessen, his gaze glued to the red and white form that was lying unconscious on the floor in front of Lashana and Telca. "Holy shit." 

"Uhh.... this isn't as bad as it looks," Lashana muttered, frowning when Xellos suddenly appeared by her side. 

Grinning, the Mazoku cleared his throat, then broke out into song. "Oh, Santa got knocked out by a wacko, coming over to our house on Christmas Eve. You may not put much faith in health coverage, but as for me and Santa, we believe!" 

"Shut up!" Telca cried, smacking him in the face with the flat of her axe, sighing when he merely smiled and thanked her. 

"Is he dead?" Tempest asked dreadfully, looking at Diane as she crept forward and knelt by the downed man's side, her fingers going to his throat. "Well?" 

"He's alive," she announced to the sound of over a dozen sighs of relief. 

"Okay, no one put on the suit. I saw that movie before," Telca announced as she threw her axe back into a portal and knelt next to Diane, reaching past her to lightly slap Santa's cheek. "Hey. Hey, wake up." 

"You know," Rebecca said, "this doesn't really surprise me." 

"You're not helping!" Lashana cried angrily, not even calming down when Blackie rushed to her side. "What are we going to do?!" 

"Pull out the coal barbeque because we're all gettin' briquettes?" Wolverine suggested, ducking the various smacks that came his way. "What? S'a valid suggestion!" 

"No it's not!" Tvashtar scolded him as he went to try to help Telca wake up Santa, very aware that the crowd was gathering closer to the unconscious male. "He's probably got a concussion." 

"What are we gonna do?" Eve asked, sighing when she received no answer. "Well?!" 

"I vote for panicking," Nightcrawler said, his voice anxious. "We knocked Santa out cold!" 

"Isn't it great?" Xellos beamed. 

"_NO!_" 

He frowned at the unified cry from the group and huffed. "You people aren't fun at all." 

"Not now Xellos!" Lashana yelled, shrinking back into her Bonded's hold when Zelgadis joined the group next to Santa and wove a Healing spell on him, wincing when the elder male groaned and finally opened his eyes. "I'm dead." 

"Ohhh, what hit me?" Santa moaned, rising a hand to his head as Diane and Telca helped him sit up. 

"If I'm not mistaken, I believe Lashana beaned you with the hilt of her sword," Xellos smiled. 

"I thought you were a demon coming to try to kill me!" the elf cried hysterically, sniffling as Tempest wove a spell and blew Xellos into orbit. "Thanks." 

"My pleasure." 

"A demon?" Baffled, Santa lowered his hand and looked at the group surrounding him, then blinked. "Oh. Right. It's you people." 

"'Us people'?" Telca echoed as she helped him to his feet and over to a couch. 

"What? You think I don't know of you? The Avatars that are a little off and their Harem of near-lunatics." 

"A _little_ off?" David echoed. "Are we talking about the same two women?" 

"Near-lunatics?" Xellos repeated as he teleported himself back to the group. "I'm insulted! I'm not a near-lunatic! I'm a full lunatic!" 

"Shut up, shut up, shut up," Lashana chanted into her hands as she covered her face, mortified. 

"I really should read those little footnotes the elves put onto my List," Santa murmured to himself as he accepted the mug of hot chocolate that Beast had gotten for him. "Ah, thank you, Hank. Now Lashana, don't take so hard. It's not everyday I get knocked out, mind you, but it's understandable." 

"You should really start using the door," Telca told him as she and the group returned to their previous spots, Kadrith and Nightcrawler giving up their places on the couch as they sat on the floor. 

"Yes, I was thinking of that myself," he agreed as he rubbed at his head. "At the very least I should do so while in this neighbourhood. One house in town had a bear trap in the fireplace!" 

"Really?" Xellos beamed. "Which house?!" 

"Ignore him," Eve said cheerfully as she bashed the Mazoku on the head and threw him into a portal. "He's a little psychotic." 

"And dat's puttin' it lightly," Remy added with a grimace. 

Chuckling, Santa set the empty mug on a side table, then picked up the sack he had dropped when he had been attacked. "I really should be going. I'm behind schedule." 

"Can we help?" Nightcrawler asked, ignoring the warning glares from Lashana and Telca. 

"Well, now that you mention it, yes. Well, at least Lashana and Telca can." 

"Er... how?" Telca asked, seeing the wary look in Lashana's eyes. "We don't have to dress up do we?" 

"That'd be a sight," Pete snickered. 

"No, no. You don't have to dress up. But your portals, you're able to portal anywhere in this world, are you not?" When they nodded, he smiled in relief and opened his bag, taking out a good hundred thirty or so presents and carefully piling them near the tree before handing Telca a list. "These have to get to the right homes. Just open a portal and place the gifts into it, they'll know where to go." 

"Uh. Right." Lashana frowned, picking up one package and looking at it curiously. 

"Thanks a lot," Santa grinned to them as he walked back to the fireplace. "And don't worry, your gifts will be here in the morning! Merry Christmas!" 

"Well," Diane murmured as Santa vanished up the chimney. "That was _new_." 

"This, can't be _that_ hard," Telca said as she stood and approached the pile of gifts, eyeing some of them curiously for a moment before experimentally opening a portal and chucking one through, blinking as she peeked into it and discovered that the present had portaled itself under a tree. "Wayhey! Easy stuff!" 

Encouraged by Telca's attitude, Lashana opened her own portal and started chucking presents through it, finding it a bit of a challenge to keep one portal open for so long. She and Telca had never really kept a portal open longer than a few seconds, and now hers had been open a minute and counting. She had never really realised how much energy it took to keep a portal open before. 

Wiping her brow, Telca threw in another present, then placed both hands at the small of her back and groaned. "What the hell was in that last one? Woof, that was heavy." 

Lashana looked up and frowned as Telca tossed in another gift. "Telca! I'm pretty sure that kid didn't ask for a copy of 'Out loud : the city kid's guide to being gay'!" 

Telca pulled the list from the back pocket of her pants and handed it to Lashana. "Well, no. But look at what he did ask for." 

There was a pause, then. "Better sent the parents companion to his folks. Put it somewhere where they'll see it." 

"I'm on it." 

"You know," Diane mused as she and the others watched the two sorceresses work. "Out of everything that happened, this was a rather calm Christmas." 

"You call knocking Santa unconscious 'calm'?" Rryslan asked in shock. 

"Well, for these two it is." 

"Point." 

"Since Lashana's busy, I'll take resentment to that for her," Tvashtar muttered, glaring at his father irritably. 

"Thanks hun!" Lashana called. "Smack him one for me!" 

Kadrith grinned evilly. "Yeah, Tvashtar. Smack him one for her." 

"Um, _no._" 

"Well, we know he's smarter than her," Tasuki smirked, ducking the thrown tree ornament that the elf whipped at his head. 

"There!" Telca grinned as she threw the last present into the portal. "Done! That's our good deed for two-thousand-four." 

"Yay," Lashana muttered as she returned to her Bonded and dropped down into his arms, resting her head on his chest. "Gods I think I nearly had a heart attack when the dust cleared." 

~The look on your face was priceless,~ Mewtwo agreed, shrugging when she shot a glare at him. ~Well it was.~ 

"I have to say, Lashana, this _has_ been one of the most memorable Christmas's we've had," Tempest chuckled. "Santa included. Though if you do that to him again next year I think he may hold a grudge." 

"I hadn't actually been planning to do that to him _this_ year, nevermind _next_ year." 

"It was entertaining just the same," Kang snickered. 

The elf rolled her eyes but let it go, turning instead to look at the Christmas tree, easily spotting the three small curled up dragons that had alighted amongst the ornaments and nested there, their eyes closed as they slept off the huge meal they had eaten. "You know, they have a good idea." 

"I hate to say it, but she's got a point," Rebecca said, looking over at Eve as her daughter rubbed at her eyes. "Time to go home, Tempest." 

"Yeah, I suppose." Standing, he stretched, then looked at the sorceresses and their Harem. "It was good to see you guys again. We'll have to do this again. Without the concussed Santa, of course." 

Lashana groaned and hid her face in her hands. "I'm never going to live that down," she muttered before she got to her feet and gave first Tempest, then Becca and Eve big hugs. "Don't be strangers, kay?" 

"Yeah," Telca smiled as she followed Lashana's example. "You're always welcome here." 

"Thanks," Rebecca smiled, linking her arm through Tempest's as he opened a portal and led her through it. "Merry Christmas!" 

"Adios! Feliz Navidad mi amigos!" Malcho called, waving a purple wing at the trio as the portal snapped shut. Yawning greatly, he rubbed a wing over his eyes, then regarded the others. "I think a nice siesta is called for, mi amigos. I'm heading to bed." 

"You can stay here overnight," Lashana said to her parents, David, Rryslan and Tasuki. "It's late, and Telca and I don't mind." She paused and looked towards the doors. "I wonder if I should tell that to Angel too." 

"Naw, he's long gone, darlin'," Wolverine said as he checked outside, then closed and locked the doors. "I'm staying up ta watch a bit more hockey, anyone wit me?" 

"Yeah!" Tasuki grinned. "I'll get the beers!" 

"You have fun," Diane told Pete as she kissed him. "I'll see you in the morning." 

"I'll show you lot to the extra rooms," Telca said, gesturing to Diane, Rryslan and David to follow her as she headed upstairs. "There's actually rooms free on our floor, so you won't have to head up to the rarely used fifth floor." 

"Then why do you _have_ a fifth floor?" David asked curiously. 

"Because two weeks every summer we're a hotel," Telca said simply, drawing a shocked look from him. "You didn't know? Hell, even Diane knew about that." 

"I've been out of the loop! That's all!" he protested, sighing when Diane gave him a sympathetic pat on the back. 

"Well, this has been a great night, hasn't it?" Lashana mused as she walked over to the fireplace and warmed her hands, smiling when Tvashtar joined her and stood by her side. "How was your first Christmas get-together?" 

"Good. Great. Thank you, kelestra." Smiling, he leaned over and hugged her to him, nuzzling her cheek tenderly before pulling away. 

"Glad you enjoyed it," she grinned, tilting her head back to look up at Blackwargreymon when he slid his arms around her from behind. "You gonna stay up and watch the game?" 

"Nah," he murmured. "The Sens aren't playing." 

Tvashtar chuckled. "I'll leave you two alone. G'night." 

"G'night, hun." Smling, she looked up at her Bonded, then smirked. "Hey, love?" 

"Yeah?" 

A slow grin spread over her lips as she beckoned him closer. "Under the mistletoe."   
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
